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Walking on Eggshells


17 years ago 0 214 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I hope it helps to know you are not alone in feeling this way. I posted here over a month ago well over 100 days in with the exact same problem. I did what you said you could not do. I went on a low dose 25mg of Zoloft an anti depressant. It totally got rid of the craves I was having non stop. If you have never tried this brand maybe your doctor could give you some samples as long as it is not dangerous for you. I guess it just takes some people longer for the craves to go away. I know they will eventually. Iwin [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 1/11/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 159 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 3,195 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $636 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 17 [B]Hrs:[/B] 23 [B]Mins:[/B] 26 [B]Seconds:[/B] 14
17 years ago 0 663 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Philip, You are not alone. I can very much relate. I'm glad you posted this because I needed to hear some of these responses too. Do you believe that it is worth killing ourselves to not feel like this right now? Or do you believe that time will heal us and sometimes we just need to redirect our attention to make it through a lull? I'm posing these questions to myself as much as you or anyone else. I feel like if I smoke, I might as well get it over with and jump off a tall building. I certainly don't want to do that. Life is too precious and delicate. That's not to say it's not confusing and sad and lonely and painful sometimes too. I think therein lies a great life lesson. The person I want to be finds some level of content or resolve when faced with any of these. Perhaps faith. I'm not that person yet but I want to be that person. Honestly, I don't even know if that's possible. But I hold on to hope, sometimes barely. One day at a time. Self-sabotage is a downfall of mine too - very insightful, Martha, thank you. Support. This is what we're all here for, Philip, and I've received support vicariously by you posting, so it's my opinion that this is exactly the purpose of this resource. Life or death, live or die. There is only do, there is no try. Choice puts the free in freedom. No hurries, no worries. Keep on keepin' on and... keep fightin' the good fight - fish [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/21/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 180 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 5,426 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $900 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 23 [B]Hrs:[/B] 9 [B]Mins:[/B] 18 [B]Seconds:[/B] 40
17 years ago 0 5195 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Phillip. Your quit is so much like my own. The self discovery, the cravings that don't seem to end, the struggle, the depression, the wanting it to be better but not knowing how to get there. The 'everyone else is doing fine so why aren't I' feeling. I know what you are talking about and I feel your pain. I apologize for being so late to respond to you in your time of need. I know how critical the moments are when you are in need. On day 132 of my quit, I was through. I had given it my best shot and I was sick of hearing about how much better everyone else was feeling because I wasn't. I wasn't feeling normal at all. I was sad and I was lonely. I missed my best friend (the cigarette). I know we keep saying time will make it better and I also know how sick you are of hearing that because I was too. Something Duffis said reminded me of another turning point in my quit. "Embrace" the quit. People would say that to me and I was like "what the heck does that mean?" Stop looking at your quit as a struggle. Find some daily inspirations and start replacing the negative thinking with positive. The inner peace is what I was missing in my quit and I didn't know how to find it. Keep reaching out, keep searching and keep trying new things until you find what works for you. I am still working on that inner peace but I am getting there. It has been a long emotional road. Another saying that I use to hold onto is "The Journey is the Reward". It really is Phillip. If you are like me, this quit is changing your entire world. The way you think, the way you deal with things, how you react, your relationships, everything. That is a lot to deal with. One step at a time my friend. One step at a time. Look over the past few months, start keeping a journal, look for positive inspirations, keep taking deep breaths, and keep marching forward. You are simply in the process of developing the new you. This is an exciting time. Be confident and stop thinking that something is wrong with you. You are simply uncomfortable with all the changes that are coming at you so quickly. "Embrace" your quit. Cherrish it and hold on to it with everything you have got. Somewhere around six months, I started feeling better about myself and my quit. Every
17 years ago 0 2830 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hold on just one moment Phillip!! There is NOTHING, I repeat [size=4]NOTHING[/size] wrong with you!!! As for taking some time off because you don't want to steer anyone wrong or scare the newbies, don't worry about that! Right now, YOU need help and that's what this support group is here for. Phillip, yes, this support group IS like counseling in a way, but we are NOT trained psychologists... I have to agree with Rusty. Talk to a counselor! What harm can it do? It can only help? If it doesn't help, it certainly won't hurt you! Why are you so scared to see a counselor? Don't answer that here... just ponder the question for yourself. They may be able to bring some things to light for you that we just can't do. There's NO shame in talking to a psychologist. NONE! I too had and still have a very difficult quit. Right now, I'm pretty comfortable in my quit, but that comfort sometimes comes and goes and I know that it has more to do with the other things that have happened in my life since quitting (like dislocating my shoulder and losing my job a year ago, moving, going back to school, not making any friends, and then dislocating my shoulder and losing my job again this year and the accident), but oftentimes, if I'm not careful, I find myself blaming my quit for these things. And then, I start having cravings, or smoking thoughts, or triggers or whatever the hell you want to call them, for several days at a time. So basically Phillip, I'm telling you that you're not alone here. There's NOTHING wrong with you! Don't beat yourself up about feeling this way. Take pride in your accomplishments and revel in your success! Be proud of who you are and what you've done! I hope things get better for you soon Phillip. Crave the Quit! Pam [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 10/28/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 234 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 5,860 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $966.42 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 17 [B]Hrs:[/B] 0 [B]Mins:[/B] 19 [B]Seconds:[/B] 2
17 years ago 0 2830 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Glad to hear it Phillip. If you need to take some time away from here and not post, I understand. I have been a lurker around this site, just reading and not posting, several times (I know you wouldn't know it by the number of posts I've made though :p ). So take the time you need. We'll be anxiously awaiting your return. Crave the Quit! Pam [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 10/28/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 235 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 5,884 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $970.55 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 17 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 1 [B]Seconds:[/B] 39
17 years ago 0 2027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Take the time you need, Phillip. Know we are here for you when you need us, and we are still pulling for you, even if we don't make it evident. :) Stay strong. Shevie [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/23/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 393 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 7,870 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1493.4 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 73 [B]Hrs:[/B] 8 [B]Mins:[/B] 37 [B]Seconds:[/B] 31
17 years ago 0 2027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Phillip, I'm so sorry you're still having such problems this far along. I want you to understand one thing above all else. Never, ever hesitate to post if you need help. Don't worry about the newbies, worry about yourself. Your quit should be the very most important thing to you, everything else is secondary. If you post something that damages another's quit, that is not your fault. You would not be the reason for their failure, merely the excuse they were looking for. A cloud passing overhead or a traffic light changing would serve the same purpose for them. Frankly, I don't know why you're still having such problems. At first I chalked it up to the 100-day thing, but it seems to be going on much too long for that. In my opinion, you have not been truly rewarding yourself properly. I know in the past you've claimed the improvements in your body to be your rewards, and those improvements are wonderful. But rewards need to be special and anything that is repeated often enough loses it's uniqueness. As far as you posting to others having problems, even if you have no advice to give, encouragement is always appreciated. I found trying to help others quite theraputic for me. Counseling may very well be in order. A real counselor, not a MD prescribing an anti-depressant. Face-to-face support as Bob suggested is probably a good idea, too. It never hurts to try new things, different avenues. Whatever it takes to stay quit. Shevie [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/23/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 392 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 7,853 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1489.6 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 73 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 53 [B]Seconds:[/B] 40
17 years ago 0 2027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Good morning, Phillip. Just wondering how you're doing today. Shevie [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/23/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 393 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 7,867 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1493.4 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 73 [B]Hrs:[/B] 7 [B]Mins:[/B] 56 [B]Seconds:[/B] 53
17 years ago 0 941 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey RD Man - You and I are at about the same place in our quits. You're a bit ahead of me so I feel I can comment about what you've just posted. First off - you promised me you wouldn't smoke and I made the same promise back to you, just so we remember.... Is there something wrong with you? Not unless there is something wrong with me as well. Yesterday I was going along fat dumb and happy when out of the blue I was hit with a crave that lasted for over an hour. I was in my garage and I wanted to get in my truck and head for the store in the worst way. I didn't, but IT SUCKED! As far as you supporting and not asking for support, or worrying about what you post - you're not Superman, you're RD Man. Give yourself a break. We want to help you as much as you want to help us. It sounds to me like your body is changing and it doesn'y know what to do with itself. The reading I have done stated that increasing the level of exercise you get helps a great deal in a quit, thus the treadmill. Perhaps you need to get moving a lot more now? I have a promise to myself to do at least 2 miles a day on the treadmill or out walking. Maybe an increase in exercise will give your body a way to use all that new clean energy it has? RD Man - there is nothing wrong with you. You can't hurt someone elses quit - they own it not you. You're not responsible to make sure I don't smoke, nor do I want you to be. I think you're doing a great job - get off the eggshells, give yourself a pat on the back and realize, you're very much like the rest of us. Best wishes RD Man! [IMG]http://i65.photobucket.com/albums/h212/cybrduke/beach9.gif[/IMG] Don't sweat it! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/7/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 104 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 3,653 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $884 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 16 [B]Hrs:[/B] 22 [B]Mins:[/B] 10 [B]Seconds:[/B] 8
  • Quit Meter

    $99,910.80

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 9150 Hours: 7

    Minutes: 33 Seconds: 15

    Life Gained

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    45414

    Smoke Free Days

  • Quit Meter

    363,312

    Cigarettes Not Smoked

17 years ago 0 19 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Philip, Loads of great advice posted here as always on this site. To me it sounds like you have made this remarkable acheivement through pure willpower and strength. I think you need to try and get into a more positive mood and see the benefits of what you are acheiving. I know people have used loads of methods here and succeeded in many different ways but I think you may benefit from reading Allen Carrs Easyway - I think you will find some inspiration there. Be strong - the thoughts and cravings don't last forever but it is a testament to the power of this poison that they last so long. You can fight this battle once - or admit defeat and fight it perpetually for the rest of your life...... [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 3/1/2004 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 840 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 16,816 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] �4200 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 124 [B]Hrs:[/B] 22 [B]Mins:[/B] 1 [B]Seconds:[/B] 26
  • Quit Meter

    $375,664.61

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 8459 Hours: 13

    Minutes: 56 Seconds: 48

    Life Gained

  • Quit Meter

    45414

    Smoke Free Days

  • Quit Meter

    999,108

    Cigarettes Not Smoked


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