There is less and less smokers all the time. Years ago I had a little smoking click at work. It was back when they actaully had a smoking room. We took breaks the same time. In the nice weather we were outside having our cigarettes. I had a quit over a year ago I failed at....but I never went back to smoking at work. And.... my smoking friends kind of dwindled. NOW..... I there is no smoking rooms.. and I bet it won't be long till you can't smoke near the building. There is VERY FEW I see out side smoking anymore. Many... many of them have quit. Some quit around the time I had last year....AND STAYED QUIT. Stupid me failed. I won't fail again. Your an odd ball if you smoke now. Mercy [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 1/21/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 54 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,096 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $241.38 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 7 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 36 [B]Seconds:[/B] 25

Serenity, I feel for you............but I won't write some long post. I will just give a different twist on the matter. How about this:,,,,THINK...... When you are ready to date....you will be sooooooo limited. Ever notice in all those adds the men want a .....NON SMOKER? :eg: Mercy [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 1/21/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 53 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,075 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $236.91 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 6 [B]Hrs:[/B] 23 [B]Mins:[/B] 23 [B]Seconds:[/B] 45

S, I don't have children or a husband or much of a social life. My immediate family are closest to my heart but are miles and miles away. And they are smokers so at a time like this I am glad they are miles and miles away. This is how I see the glass half full. I have total control over the triggers...I just stay away from them and they don't ever come knocking on my door. I must say I will have to face it in May at a family wedding...that will be my first real test. What I am saying is although things seem empty at the moment these very circumstances put you ahead of the game as far as your quit goes. So many posts here talk about people they are quitting "with". I just think that is a bad routine. I had tried that with my ex. NO go. Though you may be lonely you are likely less susceptible to triggers. This time I had to find a new routine (a healthier one, which makes me feel better about myself), and I am taking baby steps trying to figure out where the hell I am going. I'm divorced but never felt like flirting as a smoker. Well....? But I am happy, not empty, not to smoke. Try to see your circumstances as power, no one pushing your buttons. You're just in pause and need to pick your butt up and fill the time with positives. Audrey :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 1/16/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 57 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,159 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $159.6 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 5 [B]Hrs:[/B] 15 [B]Mins:[/B] 20 [B]Seconds:[/B] 54

Great Post Katy. Very, very true. That extended family that you discover, they really support you in so many ways. They're not only friends, they really do feel like family. You really and truly aren't ever at a loss as to who to call on. Love this post, Katy. Serenity, this is wonderful advice. Hugs, Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 27 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,236 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $96.93 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 2 [B]Hrs:[/B] 21 [B]Mins:[/B] 48 [B]Seconds:[/B] 6

Serenity, I can feel how desperate you are in your posts. I wish I could help you in some way. I will say this, if the only way for you to leave the house for several hours is to hire a paid babysitter, then that's what you need to do. You can't let yourself be stuck between a hard place and a rock where on one hand, You can't leave your daughter and on the other hand, your daughter thinks she's too old for a babysitter. This leaves you just flat sitting at home with so much time on your hands while contantly dwelling on how miserable you are. You're entitled to go out, have fun, and meet people. You should hire a babysitter. You don't have to use the term babysitter in front of your daughter. You have to get rid of those "buts" before you talk yourself into snuffing out "butts." Hugs, Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 27 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,232 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $96.93 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 2 [B]Hrs:[/B] 21 [B]Mins:[/B] 37 [B]Seconds:[/B] 51

Good Morning Serenity, I just scanned my earlier post and geesh!!the typos. I'm in that foggy minded stage of my quit and I'm having the worst time with my typing right now. I sure hope that wears off soon. I imagine all of us here on this site have gotten pretty good at reading between the lines since we've all gone through these stages. It's sort of like our own code. LOL Girl, with you about to start a full time job, that's another lifestyle change!! No wonder you're feeling so blue. Here your children had to go and grow up, plus they think they're old enough to be out on their own...LOL, you are in the middle of a great Quit, AND you're starting a new job. Wow!! Lots of changes there, Serenity. But, you will get through every single one of them and each one of those changes will bring about new and rewarding stages in your life. I promise. It's a huge adjustment for the kids to grow up and move out on their own but here's the thing Serenity, they will ALWAYS need you. They will always be your babies but, you'll start developing a mature friendship with your own kids. Oh, you're still Mom and always will be but never hesitate to invite one of your kids out for lunch with the extra money you'll be making on your new job. If you can't invite them out for lunch, plan a weekend trip. You will still be seeing and talking to your kids. Here's the thing, just as soon as you've made the adjustment to having that empty nest and enjoying yourself, you'll be soooo use to your privacy and the freedom to do whatever you want inside your own house, you'll have the rooms in your house fixed up exactly like you want them, and sooo use to never having to pick up behind anyone but yourself, then one of your kids will call for one reason or another and need to move back home for a while. LOL LOL Then you'll have to adjust to losing your privacy. I promise you, as hard as it is when your children move out on their own, you will adjust and you'll find yourself enjoying your privacy. In other words, that empty nest syndrome doesn't last that long and you'll find yourself giggling that you actually dreaded this stage of your life. You may be afraid of starting a new job. I know I was always so, so scared to start a new job. It made me a nervo

Serenity, I live in Texas and right now, I feel like catching an airplane and coming on over to your house. That's how I am. And I know there's a lot of good folks around your close by who are the same way. I don't think what you're feeling right now has anything to do with the addict in you. I think it has to do with the fact that you've lived all of your adult life for your kids and to the point where you've put yourself on the back burner. I mean, you've been right there like Johnny on the Spot taking care of your family but your social life has been pretty much tossed out during all of the time you've taken care of your kids. Now, you're stuck in a rut. I hate that "Stuck in a Rut" feeling. You try getting out of the rut and you feel like you're just spinning your wheels because you've actually forgotten how to make friends, how to date, and basically how to have a social life of your own. I do think that since you're alone so much of the time, that you have too much time to think about cigarettes. You do know that cigarettes aren't the answer and I believe you know this feeling will pass. But, it'll be a lot easier on you if you can get out of the house and have time to do what you want to do. While you're out doing those things, you will meet other people. I think you've been grieving over your elder leaving home and you thinking a lot about grieving over your younger leaving home shortly. Serenity, I DO know how you're feeling. Oh Lord, did I ever grieve when each one of my three children left home. Here's the thing though, as horrible as that empty nest feeling can be, you DO get use to it. I mean, if you want to walk to the coffee pot in the mornings in your underwear, you can sleep in late on the weekends without someone waking you up to be their chauffeur, etc. You will have total freedom in your house. I promise, you will get use to that empty nest. You DO need to get out of the house and meet people. I know, that one can be hard. You can't be shy and I get the feeling that you are a little shy. It's hard to get out and meet people when you've been taking care of your family for so long. But I know you can do it. Do you work? What type of activities are in your area? Serenity, are you feeling too blu

serenity2 You are moving forward, and you have done a great thing for yourself. Don't ever forget how hard you have labored at this... Stay well and strong nonic [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/25/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 80 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,938 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $560 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 15 [B]Hrs:[/B] 0 [B]Mins:[/B] 11 [B]Seconds:[/B] 23

serenity2 Your post just about broke my heart. I hear the loneliness in your words, loud and clear, like a freight train sounds on the prairie at night...Always thought a train whistle in the night was about the loneliest thing I ever did hear. I know that you know that the junkie is talking loud to you tonight. That doesn�t mean your not feeling what you are feeling, it means that you need to do something about it other than cut your life short by smoking. I am alone as well and I lost someone very dear to me with whom I thought I would grow old. That�s not going to happen now, so we (you and me) have got to grab on to the things that we have in our life now. Being alone doesn�t mean anything except that we have to look deeper into ourselves for the strength to move forward. The ironic thing about being lonely is this...The more lonely that we are the smaller the joy we must find to ease our pain...A hungry man will make a banquet of a slice of bread while man who is stuffed to the teeth will never appreciate the most royal of banquets. We have to appreciate more and more the people and things that are within arms reach and celebrate them. And thirdly, we must look outward and find new experiences that will affirm who we are...They are out there you know...The universe and all creation is an endless tapestry. All we need do is go out and have a look. I know sometimes that is hard because we are bone tired from the labor of being a human being, but if you can muster that energy to have a look around this amazing creation, you might just stumble on a little dream for yourself... Stay well, I want you to live a long long time...smoking isn't the answer, it�s not even a question... nonic

Serenity, I understand how you feel. My daughter has gone to college, and I've been completely alone for the first time in my life. While at times it feels exactly as you describe, other times it feels like a brand new beginning. You don't want to smoke, because it will keep you from living your life to the fullest now and later. That's one thing that made me finally quit--I was tired of being a slave to it, and having to rush home to smoke. I was tired of it limiting my activities. Think of these things. Think of all the reasons you quit in the first place. I agree that it sounds a lot like the empty nest stuff getting you down. Just don't let it make you think smoking will help. It won't, but you already know that. Tomorrow will be a better day. I'll say a prayer for you tonight. Hang in there. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/31/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 73 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,109 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $140.89 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 14 [B]Mins:[/B] 5 [B]Seconds:[/B] 30