Tick tock...........MAN, the night seems to be crawling. I've been glued to this site for the past hour or so, just to pass the time. I want this day to end, like yesterday. I just can not for the life of me get the smoking thoughts to go away. I've read and read on here, replied to a few people but I don't even feel like typing much to anyone. I have a 25th wedding anniversary in August and a wedding coming up in October and I WANT to be able to go to both events without thinking every minute of smoking or drinking. I have not replaced cravings with food yet. I have my very expensive mouth guard in my mouth right now, which makes me feel like not drinking anything or eating anything. It cost $300 from my dentist but without it, she tells me that I would be wrecking my teeth. I don't grind my teeth, but I clench my jaw a lot during the day and night, so I'm wearing it as much as possible. It's amazing what stress does to me. She told me that I clench my jaw due to stress. I guess it's better than dealing with it head on right now.(my opinion). I have both my boys out for the night, still in the field combining, my husband is in bed, snoring like crazy, my youngest daughter is watching the first Pirates of the Carribean with her friend who is here for a sleep over and my oldest daughter is in the bathroom, God knows doing what, Plucking her eyebrows or shaving or something. She does work in the morning,but takes a day and a half to get ready. I have no desire to eat anything big since I quit. I think I have some sort of stomach problems. I have only been sipping on soup and drinking liquids, lots of them. I have not gotten my heartburn back again, thank goodness, but the headaches came back. I want soo much to feel good again, physically. But right now I feel like I lost my best friend. Oh yeah, I did. She doesn't get my new attitude at all about quitting drinking and smoking and has yet to have a get together with me this summer which is real abnormal. We used to hang out a lot during the summer, at the beach and in her backyard and mine but I think I scared her away. She probably thinks I'm too clean to be with her now. I don't care. I've lost many friends due to my drinking problems, what's another. There's more friends to be found in my view. I want to star
