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Stages of change

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Questions to challenge negativity

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Browse through 411.760 posts in 47.060 threads.

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MISERABLE


17 years ago 0 607 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Its a cruel world out there and I'm slowly (and I mean REAL slow) getting out of this slump. I've decided I'm rewarding myself this weekend and doing what I want when I want (kid permitting since two of mine are still young). Told my hubby I need a break and I want a reward darn it! and he agreed. :p so both of us are going to take turns and reward our 30 days because I fully agree that this is more difficult if the rewards aren't there. I'm still miserable but trying to at least get out of my funk. I'm already looking forward to the weekend where the neighborhood troubled teens change the paint color on our new car again. Gotta love summer when the kids are out of school. I'm going to sign up for this weekend of NOPE! I do every weekend so that way I have to be honest with myself and hold myself accountable!! Kim PS Dang, 30 days went actually quick! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 6/7/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 30 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 758 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $121.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 2 [B]Hrs:[/B] 16 [B]Mins:[/B] 14 [B]Seconds:[/B] 41
17 years ago 0 1070 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Wow, your almost to 1 month quit! What a huge accomplishment! I think you need a nice little reward to get past this slump. When the tough get going you should focus on how proud you are that you have been quit this long. STay busy and try to support your hubby without trying to control his quit. If he smokes then that is his decision and only he can make it! You hold on tight to your quit, you'll be just fine. Trudge through this rough spot and you will be so proud that you made it! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/15/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 51 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,030 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $229.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 3 [B]Hrs:[/B] 16 [B]Mins:[/B] 1 [B]Seconds:[/B] 6
17 years ago 0 547 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I'm with Jacko on this, you've got EXCELLENT advice here from all who have preceeded me. Take one and run with it! N.O.P.E. Many Blessings Sent Your Way!! Eve :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 4/8/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 89 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 719 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $267 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 7 [B]Hrs:[/B] 13 [B]Mins:[/B] 32 [B]Seconds:[/B] 6
17 years ago 0 962 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Cheermom - My situation is alot like Rusty's. My husband still smokes :( I had to realize that I cannot control anyone's quit but my own. I think he is mad at me because we tried to quit together and he just couldn't do it. Now I have 135 plus days and he is not being very nice to me and I think it's because I was able to stop and he wasn't. Sad, isn't it. Damned if we do, and really damned if we don't. So don't give up...Rewards are very, very important! Treat yourself this weekend and enjoy! Island Girl [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/21/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 136 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,365 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $272 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 15 [B]Hrs:[/B] 22 [B]Mins:[/B] 17 [B]Seconds:[/B] 33
  • Quit Meter

    $1,705,012.50

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 5866 Hours: 18

    Minutes: 42 Seconds: 38

    Life Gained

  • Quit Meter

    45467

    Smoke Free Days

  • Quit Meter

    1,364,010

    Cigarettes Not Smoked

17 years ago 0 80 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi cheermom! Well I find that this time right now, YOU MUST be selfish! You have to take care of your quit, no one elses. I wouldn't even get into his stuff right now. You have to take care of you right now! I found I have to avoid certain places and people right now. Too bad but I have to look out for me until I am strong enough! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 6/26/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 10 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 320 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $75 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 23 [B]Mins:[/B] 9 [B]Seconds:[/B] 22
17 years ago 0 5195 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Cheermom.... keep breathing. Deep, deep breaths. You are perfectly normal and you know that you don't have control over anyone but yourself. Quitting is tough stuff and it isn't over in just a few days or a few weeks. You smoked for years and it takes a long time to get over the damage smoking has caused. The emotional part of the quit is the hardest in my opinion. You and hubby hang in there because this is going to pass and you will get through it as long as you don't smoke. Just in case you didn't know, smoking will not make everything better, it will not make your marriage better, it will not end the bickering, it will not do anything for you except kill you. You cannot control hubby's quit. You are only in charge of yourself. So take some more deep breaths and hang on tight. This road is really rocky at times. You CAN do it! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 7/1/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 369 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 7,388 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1291.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 32 [B]Hrs:[/B] 13 [B]Mins:[/B] 21 [B]Seconds:[/B] 53
17 years ago 0 610 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hope that you are feeling better cheermom. Try and turn your mind towards the positives of not smoking. Don't concentrate so much on how you feel. Just keep thanking yourself that you have found your way to a non poisonous lifestyle; for you, for your children; for your life. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/25/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 44 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,206 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $165 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 5 [B]Hrs:[/B] 20 [B]Mins:[/B] 11 [B]Seconds:[/B] 24
  • Quit Meter

    $90,934.00

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 5962 Hours: 11

    Minutes: 56 Seconds: 17

    Life Gained

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    45467

    Smoke Free Days

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    454,670

    Cigarettes Not Smoked

17 years ago 0 2027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Cheermom, it may take 21 days to break a habit, but this is an addiction and takes a lot longer. It sounds like both you and your hubby are in the 30-day pit. This is a normal part of the process and usually only lasts a few days. For some reason, men seem to have a much harder time quitting than women; some male ego thing. He's struggling and won't ask for help. You're struggling, but getting help here that makes your struggles more bearable. He sees you doing better than him, the ego thing kicks in, and now it's [u]your[/u] fault he's having problems. [i]"I didn't want to quit. You made me do it!"[/i] Stay in counseling, give each other space, and above all else, protect your quit! Shevie [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/23/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 408 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 8,168 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1550.4 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 76 [B]Hrs:[/B] 3 [B]Mins:[/B] 17 [B]Seconds:[/B] 33
17 years ago 0 2462 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Cheermom, please understand this. You have no control over anyone else's quit. Focus on your own quit. If you obsess about the why's and wherefore's of your husband's quit, you may as well throw in with him. The most important thing you can do right now is leave him alone and mind your own business. Your business? Your quit! Own it, possess it, protect it, cherish it. Tune him out. He will quit when he is ready. How do I know this? My husband still smokes. He has no intention of quitting ever. But by fiercely protecting my quit, I've been able to achieve the stats below. If he quits, great. If he doesn't, it's his business. Rusty :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/13/2004 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 569 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 15,943 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1991.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 78 [B]Hrs:[/B] 7 [B]Mins:[/B] 49 [B]Seconds:[/B] 15
  • Quit Meter

    $55,359.20

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 653 Hours: 18

    Minutes: 26 Seconds: 22

    Life Gained

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    5323

    Smoke Free Days

  • Quit Meter

    212,920

    Cigarettes Not Smoked

17 years ago 0 12049 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
cheer, You have made it 28 days. You have to want this! Remember, protecting your quit, you need to do this for yourself. Have you taken some time to yourself to regroup and relax? You may want to try this and start fresh and keep yourself intact. This is not going to be easy, but it does get better. Reinforce your quit and others will follow. Keep Strong, Josie _____________________ The SSC Support Team.

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