Newbkr, I had a slight, say "burp" in my quit last weekend when I went out in a similar situation. If it were me, I might not go out, and not put myself in the situation again. That said, take a straw with you. You can chew on it, play with it in your fingers, and otherwise soothe the desire to keep hands busy. If you're using a NRT, or thinking about it, I find the inhaler works well at the bar. Get the sensation while inhaling, without actually smoking. You can play with it, flick it, etc. Other than that, just be strong. Keep quit. I"ll be rooting for you! Kleo~ [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 1/2/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 10 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 60 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $25.9 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 16 [B]Mins:[/B] 10 [B]Seconds:[/B] 36

Butterfly could it be on day at a time? [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 1/2/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 9 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 261 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $33.3 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 22 [B]Mins:[/B] 34 [B]Seconds:[/B] 37

newbkr, I know exactly what your going through, same thing happened to me last friday night, with smokers and drinks. what I did is only had a couple of drinks found the 1 person that doesn't smoke in our group and stuck by her side. And when everyone went out side to smoke i smiled to myself because I didn't have to go out in the cold anymore.. Gum helps too. I am not saying that what worked for me works for everyone but these are just some suggestions.. They also say that you shouldn't drink so soon into your quit. My thoughts on that are you have to live your life and can't be afraid that everytime you do something that you used to do with smoking that your gonna smoke again. Be strong!! You can do it.. kk had a great idea when she went out last weekend, she got an empty pack and put gum and stuff in it and wrote little sayings on it that helped her not smoke.. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 1/1/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 10 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 313 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $65 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 18 [B]Mins:[/B] 32 [B]Seconds:[/B] 35

Newbkr, I cannot say that what worked for me will work for you, but here goes: I had two nights of alcoholic encouters with smokers my FIRST weekend. You have GOT TO GET YOURSELF MENTALLY PREPARED. That was my main amunition...just telling myself that no matter what, no matter how many triggers happened, no matter what the crave, just don't do it. I worked on that before my quit and pretty much all day every day since. I just don't smoke...period. For me, I had to go on with all the other things I did in life. By cutting other things out, it seemed like I was giving up so much more than smoking. I made sure I mentioned several times to everyone I was how many days I had already been smoke free. I even told them that I was going to reward myself with an hour massage at my 30-day mark. Congratulations ensued. Gotta love praise. :) The group was a mix of smokers and non smokers. Occassionally when someone lit up, I'd say, "Oh, I wish I could have a cigarette." But ya know what, since I had prepared myself mentally, it was just kinda something I said INSTEAD of actually lighting up. Even as the words came out of my mouth I knew they weren't true. I knew deep down that I wanted to be a non-smoker. I did tell myself that I could just leave the situation if I really couldn't handle it. I did also make the fake pack of smokes with candy & gum inside and lots of inspirational sayings on the outside, just in case I would need that feeling of reaching for something. Didn't need it though. Didn't go for it once. It may not be the best approach, but REALLY REALLY getting my mind on board was the biggest and best thing I could have done to help with my quit. Once I did that, I was able to still enjoy all the other things in life, whether they used to be triggers or not. Does that mean I don't still think about how I used to smoke during those times? Absolutely not, but I can smile and be proud each and every time because I know I will not give in. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 1/3/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 8 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 79 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $24 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 16 [B]Mins:[/B] 15 [B]Seconds:[/B] 10

Hang in there. The tempatation will alwasy be there...if not this party than the next one. REPLACE the smoking with something else...maybe use a stirer in your hand....cinammin stick..gum....straw..anything that will occupy your hands while you socialize. Sooner or later we all have to deal with other people around us smoking and it not affecting us wanting to lite up again. This is the hard part for me as well. YOU CAN DO IT. WE CAN DO IT

I'm not experienced in bereavement counselling but I guess its all part of the grieving process. Have you talked to anyone about it (a professional that is)? Cos you've got two separate issues here, and if you could deal with them individually....... would that help? Brent

You are absolutely correct........I did a piece about looking for excuses to smoke without realising that you had a hell of an excuse, I then did a search on your posts and picked up the story. It's a lesson in putting brain into gear before engaging fingers (on keyboard that is). My post was probably valid to some degree but was a bit uncompromising in the circumstances. So how are we going to stop you smoking! We do not want you launching yourself out there socially at the tender young age of 40 (got that somewhere from one of your posts) as Little Miss Stinky! I can't stop for you but I sure as hell will support you in any way that I can. Mad Englishman [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 12/8/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 40 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 283 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] �200 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 6 [B]Hrs:[/B] 17 [B]Mins:[/B] 43 [B]Seconds:[/B] 26

Hi Newbkr I'm always so glad to see you posting in here. I think of you often and you are in my thoughts. You have been through so much these past few months and I know that keeping this quit is important to you. You know what you will have to do to keep from smoking! It won't be easy my friend, so you will just have to make up your mind that smoking is not an option. One thing you could try is to make a deal with yourself. Say to yourself that if you don't smoke this week-end you can re-think your options next time a party comes up. I know that sounds silly but I'm always making deals with myself. Hummmm, maybe I have that Sybil thing going on, lol. Please try and keep your quit. I'll be thinkin of ya. vicki just 1 puff away from 2 packs a day [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 10/17/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 86 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 3,463 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $602 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 11 [B]Hrs:[/B] 18 [B]Mins:[/B] 44 [B]Seconds:[/B] 24

Thats exactly what I'm saying Pam. The psychology behind that is pure genius. By the time she has made it through the deal, she will have the craving behind her. It's a technique I learned in my getting sober group that you do at the time to put off the crave. By the time you've done this, you don't have the crave anymore. So next time you do it all over again, lol. It's so simple but sometimes it's the simple things that keep you straight. We are always saying "just for today, I do not smoke" which is in and of itself a deal that just for today you stop. Life is always a deal. You just have to know how to handle the cards dealt. Keep the Quit vicki just 1 puff away from 2 packs a day ;) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 10/17/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 86 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 3,467 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $602 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 11 [B]Hrs:[/B] 18 [B]Mins:[/B] 53 [B]Seconds:[/B] 36

Newbkr- I remember your circumstances and applaud you for realizing you must get on with your life. I think you need to find someone in your group of friends you can confide in about your quit, hopefully a non-smoker, and stick ith that person. I wish you well, and think about you all the time when I come here. xxx SILVER [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 9/17/2005 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 117 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 3,523 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $760.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 16 [B]Hrs:[/B] 8 [B]Mins:[/B] 8 [B]Seconds:[/B] 8