Just looking for a place where I can say it out loud, and this is as close as I can get to my friends. Having a really bad night and for the first time in ages have really considered giving up on this quit. Doesn't that depress you? Does me.
Don't know if it is all the bad news today, the weather, the war, hormones, life in general, or something else. Been tossing off this crave since around 4 this afternoon. Still comming around. Pretty sure I won't smoke so don't get to freaked. Mostly just causing alot of emotions, loss of patience, anger, sadness.
Most likely a combination of the heat, and the county doing road work on the road out of my house. They have been doing it since the end of May and don't plan on being done until the end of August. So any time I want to leave my house, I have to drive to the end of the road and wait for the pilot car to show up. They can't keep on schedule, so never know how long I will have to wait. Today was 40 minutes. Makes me feel like a little kid who can't go across the street alone. Running into alot of little kid treatment.
Think that I will wrap up in a blanket, and go sit in a lawn chair and watch the sky. Always helps to focus on how unimportant these little things are in the big picture.
I'm sure this mood will move on, so thanks for letting me blow off here. Still wanting that cig though. Sorry!
Cheryl
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 7/4/2005
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 382
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 9,170
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1088.7
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 49 [B]Hrs:[/B] 23 [B]Mins:[/B] 16 [B]Seconds:[/B] 12