Hi, my name is Mark. I'm 42 and going through a divorce. I feel like I'm painted into a corner and don't know where to turn or what to do. I have a young son with my wife and I love and care for him but his Mom and I have grown apart. I feel that my life is over. I have always been very fit and image-conscious but over the last 3-4 weeks the irregular sleep and/sleeping on the sofa; arguments; constant undermining of my self-esteem and who knows what else has driven me into the ground. I am tired and the one thing that was keeping me sane I just can't seem to do. I love my son and he's a fantastic little guy but I am not selfish and realize he needs to be with his Mom. She doesn't have a good word to say about me even though I spend lots of time with him; I feed him; I change his diapers; we play together; I read to him and I buy him nice little outfits. I admit that I strayed outside of the marriage and the timing was wrong - I should have waited until we were separated. I take full responsibility for this. However, I've been ostracized by all our joint "friends" who failed to see that I've supported her financially and emotionally over the time we've been together, despite me realizing that I wasn't in love with her. I've supported her through her education, through tough times at work and I was there assisting at the birth of my son. She has caused arguments with me and my parents - in fact, I didn't speak to my parents for four years as they had had another falling out and I was terrified to contact them as I knew it would irritate her. Just recently I have contacted my parents and I am angry at my lack of assertiveness in the past - it’s ridiculous that I let her do this to me. She's tried to chuck me out of my own home at least twice. Despite all this, I still care for her as a friend and I acknowledge that she's a great Mom to my son. I'm just really, really tired of all the bashing and negativity. I realize this note is all over the place, but I'm speaking from the heart....
