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Tried Going back to work....didn't really work out so well...

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Tried Going back to work....didn't really work out so well...

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

Hi Sally,

So glad that you are 'not to sad' now! You are doing really well- changing your thinking, actually doing the relaxation exercises (they can only work if you do them!!), being open-minded, and getting support!

Enjoy your 'simple' Thanksgiving dinner. Reminds me of the KISS acronym: Keep It Simple, Sweetie!

Tiana, Health Educator

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 15

Hi, Ashley

Well, here I am, finished my first week back at work. On Tuesday I went to the city to see my doctor and she could see that I was feeling better and said I should go back half time for two weeks. Then on Wednesday I saw an RPN who decided that I need to have my meds checked so that will happen in the near future. She thinks I am more anxious than depressed. We will see. I did work Wed thru Friday, but it was hard to leave after 4 hours so ended up staying longer than planned. The RPN gave me a couple of relaxtion exercises and, wouldn't you know it, I had to use them right away on Thursday AM at work when I panicked about the work that had been done in my absence that was not up to my own expectations. After I did them exercises I felt better and realized that things weren't as bad as I thought. (I am a perfectionist and can't do things sloppily so if I see that the others aren't as thorough as I am I do get quite anxious.) Today, after work, I am exhausted and looking forward to the long weekend. I also got a couple of things done that were on my to-do list--even if one of them didn't get done until 9:30 last night (washing kitchen floor). I did feel a sense of accomplishment. I am sure (notice the assertiveness) that I will be able to cross more off my list tomorrow. Just a little panicky about Thanksgiving dinner but am determined to keep it simple and enjoy the day. Happy Canadian Thanksgiving to all of you!!

Not so Sad-Sally

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11226

Sounds like a great beginning Sally!

Congrats!

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 15

Well, I went back to work for what was to be just a couple of hours but turned out to be 5 hours. Actually it was like I had never been gone, except the depression was diminished. No one made a fuss and I just stepped into my usual position of getting to the root of some problems and setting info-gathering into place so I could explain it to the guys. (I am a lone female working with five men.) I probably won't go back on Tuesday as I have a Doctor Appoint in the city. Anyway, I hope that I can keep up the positive attitude. However, I will take heed from Wildcat's note and go back at my pace, not too fast. I certainly do not know how healed I am at this point. But I think I made a good beginning, right?

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11226

Thanks for sharing Wildcat!

You make a very good point! It takes time to heal!

I'm sure this will help a lot of members.

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 456

hi,

I have had two progressive returns to work for two separate emotional events and I learned a lot because I botched them both

. I do not know if me experience might be of some help. ? The first thing I had to learn is that depression, anxiety, and mania all take a physical toll on the brain and body like when I broke my ankle (another sick leave disaster

). So my sick leaves were valid and merited ALL of the time and each time. I needed to heal. I need the time to adjust to a new way of functioning - a new emotional stability.

I said I botched my returned because I was in a hurry to get back to my life and did not know all this! So of course I was EXHAUSTED and cried and was guilt-riddled after three short days of sitting at my desk. (I did the same think with me ankle and it hurt like I had broken it all over!)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11226

Hi Sally,

You do not sound crazy! Your concerns are very valid. I am not a doctor so I could not diagnose you but it does sound like there may be a little social anxiety that could be affecting you? I am not sure but you could check out the Panic Center (www.paniccenter.net) for more information. I would also highly recommend talking to a doctor or psychologist. Getting a proper diagnoses you are confident with will help to ease your mind and help you find appropriate treatment.

Let us know what you decide to do and keep posting!

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 15

Ashley

I had all the symptoms of depression, especially when I had to be with other people--crying whenever someone at work spoke to me, crying when someone sympathized with me, crying when I had to explain why I felt depressed, not wanting to socialize at all, feeling useless, etc. However after a few days of stress leave, when I am at home alone, I don't have these feelings right now because I don't have to talk to anyone or answer the phone unless it is someone I know, eg. my daughter. As long as I don't have to be around people and explain myself, I am perfectly content. I can make my lists, do what I can on them, and feel like I accomplished something when I can cross off one thing. I like to be by myself but I do feel guilty when I discourage anyone from coming to see me. I lose all track of days and time.

Maybe, though, it is time for me to go back to work--at least for a few hours a day next week. At least there I can hide in my corner and know exactly what I need to do--not have to try and figure out what to do next. I realize I am rambling but that's the way things have been unless I make a list. I sound like a crazy woman at times!!!

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11226

Hi Sally,

That is an interesting question. I am not sure if I will have an answer for you. I can say that with depression often comes a lot of guilt. Could it be possible you feel guilty about the depression? Could you feel that you might be faking it because you are worried that is what others think?

What makes you think you are depressed?

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 15

I went back and tried to delete the preceding message so I wasn't able to receive an answer to my question. However, maybe I have been treated for depression for so long, I don't really know if I am a fake or not. Could that be possible?

Also, I just read the bit about jotting down activities and thoughts as I go all day, not just hour by hour. Maybe I'll try that so then I can fill in my Activity Schedule.

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Tried Going back to work....didn't really work out so well...