Hey Ashley, Thanks for the reply of encouragement. I needed it. I found out this morning that my oldest son (stepson really but I'm the only dad he's really known and boy did I screw that up) was commited to a crisis intervention facility yesterday. Great huh? Then my youngest grandchild he's 4 months was rushed to the hospital for emergency surgery. I can't believe everything has happened at one time. But you know what. I have found it in me to support them and forget about my problem somewhat. I know they need me and I'm going to be there no matter what!!! I can't forget about my problem cause when I'm not near them it creeps back into my head, but I feel I have some of the knowledge of the tools to use to keep my head straight. I don't want them to see me fall apart. A quick note about my wife. I have had 4 bypasses,2 mini strokes TIA ,and 7 stents implanted along with several heart attacks. (myocardial infarctions) My wife has literally watched me pass twice . If she is not the strongest woman on the planet I can't imagine who is! I was very afraid this time around because she had made a comment one day that she couldn't go through this again. I've found out very differently. She noticed months ago without telling me that she new where I was headed. When I finally came apart she was right by my side doing everything she could to get me help and support me. I know that I can support her through any crisis and I will! This latest one with the boys is just a drop in the bucket compared to what she has been through with me. I didn't smoke,or drink for many years. I'm not overweight and never had high blood pressure. It all was heredity. I'm only 50 years old but years of 16 to 20 hour days 6 or 7 days a week has taken it's toll. My wife says that I've been rode hard and put up wet. Only problem is I was the one doing the riding. 30 years of that and dreams of early retirement took me away from my family and now what do I have?
Welcome to the family.
