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Stigma surrounding mental illness

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

hi lost1. I still have problems with one day at a time. I need control over everything to keep things stable and I resemble an old time communist... useless 5 year plans for EVERYTHING. I am learning a lot from my phobie-zero (anxiete self-help-group), but one day at a time still eludes me. I am trying th "i will plan my day without directing it." Which means I will not cram every single second with three tasks and I will not manipulate everyone around me at home and work into smiling. good luck, and take advantage of the rest period. Job hunting is stressful and emotionally draining. I hope we will be one of your supports when you are ready.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

Dark night: At this point I don't know what I'll do after the military. Maybe try to get a civil service job working on aircraft and aviation ground support equipment (my profession) if possible. Don't have a clue at this point- I'm just trying to make it one day at a time...

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 86

I won't tell anyone what my problem is. It is embarrassing and people just don't understand and think you're a freak. In fact I wish I didn't tell the Ms. because I know things would be going better now.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 8760

Wildcat, Thanks for sharing your experiences with us. You may want to search the internet. There are a few support groups for family members of individuals with depression. Most are anonymous also and that may suit him better because he can do it when he wants, reads when he want without anyone knowing the wiser. This type of thing is sometimes tougher for men. Danielle, Bilingual Support Specialist

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

hi gang, I was reading through this topic because to a certain degree I need to hide. My father was bi-polar and everyone in the family "a passer au cash". Everyone was treated badly by him. He isolated himself for years at a time during major depressive moments and said horrible thing to family and the few friends he had left. He was suicidal at times and threatened my grand-parents and I with his hunting guns one or two times. then there were his manic periods where he invited one or two cousins (usually the free-loading kind) to drink everything to obivion... our meager budget and all. so today, those who survived all that cannot go back. And I would only open old wounds with my illness and my fears. My few previous attemps at discussion were detoured and contoured so I gave up. i love my aunt and cousins, they are all I have left so I cannot drag them back to all that. My husband is all I have in this illness -personally speaking- Medically is anothre story. There are times I worry about him. I would like him to see a social worker once in a while to have a support while supporting me, but he doesn't what... well he's a big boy now. At work my three superiors know about my illnesses and medications. i was on sick-leave for nearly 4 months at my last major episode. And that is where I draw the line. I told my team mates I had burn-out which is the professional looking depression with exhaustion. And there were rumors that it was easy to fake burn-out to get paid vactions. And that i would be a junkie soon, I'd be coming in looking like a zombie... I ignored Ms Perfectlife with all the Perfectsolutions in 2005 and still do taday. we are civil and that where it ends. But that hurt me at the time and I know that I have to be careful about the crew of girls around here.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

It is sad how a stigma pushes into your life and then everything has to change,and not by choice either. I have found since learning of my depession it has cost me alot.Like you a good stable career. I just turned 50 and have 4 years to go to retire with a full pension in the automotive industry. I will never make it. I am hoping for a disability pension. It is difficult to work ,function properly with family when meds are involved to keep you feeling better.It seems like your branded(oh you have a Mental Problem!)People treat you differently, I have lost the social circle too,plus many material things. Even the most important thing family.Only thing that I haven't lost or has left me is my husband of 27 years.But they say to look to the positive side of everything...lol...there is not much positive structure left. What will you do after the military?Your life is just about change like mine, I hope it is for the better. Does the stigma really matter,it is how you look at your life and challange your illness.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

I'm in the military and knew that if I ever sought treatment my career would likely be over. Well, after enduring MDD in the closet for 4-5 years I finally asked for help, and sure enough, I won't be allowed to reenlist beyond the 20-year mark. (I have 17 years in now.) I am grateful that they are allowing me to retire instead of kicking me out, but their attitude shows how old-fashioned and (to some degree) inept military physicians can be. My choices are to either not say anything, be a poor performer and a danger to my team, and I'll be allowed to stay in to 30 years, or- ask for help, feel much better and be a better service member, but be forcibly retired because I'm on meds. The proverbial Catch 22... As for the stigma associated with mental illness, I have seen some changes in a few of the people who know- mostly in the form of politely excluding me from social activities I was invited to before and so forth. It bugs me, but not enough to let it get me down. At 45 years of age my world rarely centers on what the people around me think- especially coworkers. ;) My wife is supportive and my (grown) kids don't know- and that's the way I want it. So all in all while I do notice the stigma in the work environment, it doesn't impact me too much socially as very few people know about it.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

Hi nelliek, Thanks for sharing this here with us. Many fear these same concerns and tend to keep these issues very private. Please don't ever hesitate to share your experiences of depression here on our anonymous site though. Members here truly understand what it is like to live with feelings of depression. We are all here to support one another. Casey ________________________________ The DC Support Team

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4

I am seen as a happy and carefree person by nearly everyone who knows me and they are usually shocked to hear I have MDD and am on meds for it. The most worried I am is if people at work find out. I am a teacher and a lot of gossip flies about regarding other people. I was petrified about telling my boyfriend but he was really supportive and although he doesn't truly understand (who can if they've never been depressed?)he does his best to work with me. My family are quite understanding also. I feel lucky and unlucky at the same time

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 8760

No problem NullPoint. Be sure to keep checking in and letting us know how you're doing. Danielle ____________________ The DC Support Team

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Stigma surrounding mental illness