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I need some direction ...

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 8760

Hi Wildcat,

Sorry to hear about your misadventure. I wouldn't take her advice to heart as nurses are not permitted to diagnose, let alone recommend changes to medication.

Do follow-up with your MD.

Danielle, Bilingual Health Educator

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

hi Gabs,

I am better. Just upset that the psy nurse could diagnose me on the phone and say my MD can easily up the anti-depressants. If it were that easy I could call in a presciption from what I read on the internet and try some self medications!

Anyways I will call the MD and see if he wants me in. And I will tell him about the nurse on the phone; if he is as upset as me I will write to my member of parlement and see what are their new laws concerning the overflow of patients in public institutions. Hey, the MP is the one who directs the hospital!

I hate to complain but it is just so ridiculous that I fork over 20% of my pay to the governments and they cannot provide any basic psychiatric services for the summer!

strange how at lunch I was lobster red, in pain and doubt about basic survival. I was confused and angry with people on the phone for judging me. and a few hours later it is all gone. Poof. The faery god-mother sprinkled dust and gone. I am not angry at the nurse, nor the co-ordinator. I know that the system is as it is and I will do very little to make it better. But I am ready to try! Strange eh?

I do not know if this kinda thing happenss to the unipolar. I think it is more common to the cyclothemic?? (spelling?) and rapid cycling bipolars...

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 172

Hi wildcat,

How i feel for you. I really wish that I could find some helpful words.

Its so very hard when the meds dont seem to work and there appears to be nowhere you can get help.

Some of what we experience I am sure is hormonal.

I take thyroxine and have my blood checked every 4 months.

If it is out of whack then I am worse than normal! I also take H.R.T

My Medication has been increased and instead of being awake all night i now sleep through the day and night!

Unlike you the meds have turned me into a zombie like state so there are no tears (relief) however there is no emotion at all. I am not sure what is worse.

Is it too much to ask just to want to be normal, whatever normal is?

You know what i want for us ALL, just to wake each day and be happy to be alive, to be pain free, to be supported by our friends and family, to laugh a lot, to cry a little, to be able to give something back to people.

To grow old with some integrity

Just simple things that most take for granted.

I do hope you are feeling a little better today. x

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

thanks Josie.

Acctually I am better already. I guess it is hormonal or something this am.

strange.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12049

wildcat,

Venting does help and I hope this helped for you. Why not use this as a journal and bring a copy to your next appointment. Start by substituting out the negative words and put in positive ones. You are not defective, you are productive and creative.

Give yourself some relax time when you get home. Say hello, close the door and breathe. Take a few moments for you and you only.

Continue talking to your doctor about medications and let him know where you stand, and how you feel. Communication is key and you need to say what you are feeling and what is occurring.

Take that 15 minutes when you get home.

Josie, Health Educator

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

the waterworks has shut down for now and I am to functional. back to the grist mill.

too much work too little time... I guess I can still do something.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1890

I wish I had something to offer you, Wildcat... I am sorry for all the pain and confusion you're going through concerning psychiatric help... BTW, you're not a cry-baby... this site is good for us to let it all hang out...

Patrick

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

hey, the hospital called. The psychiatrist will not see me. She did her evaluation and refered me to the clinic and that is it. I have to go to the emergency of the psychiatric to maybe get help. The nurse there will evaluate me and see if I am emergency material... or I can beg my m.d. to up the dose of my anti-depressants.

It is so discouraging. I feel like I am a cry baby. I am miserable and everyone is patting me on the head going there-there it is all over there-there..

now, I am a horrible shade of red and am embarrassed like hell to move out of my cubicle - or turn around to face the others here!

Discouragement I feel! bored I feel! disappointed I feel! Why can't i be numb to these and only be intensely happy, encouraged, and energetic?

Know what i want, to see the md and tell him to start mood stablisers regardless of what the psych wrote in last year's report. Know what, I want to take 2 pills, only two, and sleep the day away and hope some of the pain subsides like the flu of bad cold.

what do I do?

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

I have had it. I do not know where to go nor what to do.

I tried the pill diminuation in Feb that did not go well. Well last week I was fed-up of always being grogy and sleepy so I started to cut my seroquel 25mg in half. I am finally awake and I realise how much I want to just give up. My body is finally moving; I went out and had a nice weekend. I went bike riding, spent some money at garage sales, went garden shopping. And last night, I knew how much pleasure my family had... and I was flat, empty. Not even a "clean-hair smile" came up!

I am finally not a public menace when I take the car and bike, but I now am thinking all wrong and feeling "tout croche" -out of sorts and akward-. I have no plans, no goals, no projects. I tried beading and everything I have made in the past two months is UGLY so why bother. I tried something new ... painting on glass, what a disappointment... colours and effects were all wrong ... it was ugly. I varnished the picnic table with the family and my 5 years old had a BLAST as did my husband. I was bored.

Maybe, I am bored with life? Maybe I am defective?

I called the mood and anxiety clinic and have 7 patients before me... and no place for me in June. The docs will not take new patients in July and Aug due to vacations. So no help there. I called the Evaluation clinic at the psych hospital to see if I could see the doc who refered me the clinic and no answer since 9:30 this am. My psychologist can't do anything with me but support since my moods keep "shearing". And she is worried about my stability. My general practiciner is at a loss as what to do with me.

And the worst of it is ... each refers me to the other ... the hospital : maybe it is your period -yes and- maybe your thyroid see the doc. The doc refered my to the hospital because the jump is too big to me "normal" life moods. All want me to see the psychologist and she is at a loss what to do with me because I stay rational and functional, and am a ball of pain inside.

with the family and my salary (even with insurance) I can't afford to disburse to a private psychiatrist.

so what do I do? where do I go from here?

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I need some direction ...