Welcome Godislove, This a great place to connect with other people like us who are going through difficult times. I find that people who respond are generous and kind and want to reach out to someone else who will not judge their feelings. I am new to this group as well for the past two weeks. I am trying to work this program by writing in the mood tracker, but I still have to work on the daily activities log sheet. So far I have found some similarities between the times of my best hours and worst hours and what triggers my depression or anger to be less or worse. So it is helpful. Best wishes to you and take care. Wishingwell

Hi! I so understand how you feel, I am a loner too! My family has nothing to do with me and I am left to fend for myself on holidays and yes it is very depressing! I do go to church but I get loved when I in chruch but get forgotten once I walk out the door. Its a sad life but I keep busy with work and my computer contacts. Welcome to the group, I am new too and so glad to see I am not alone.

Dear Sum Guy - So many of us are alone, or if in relationships, feel alone. I am alone and have been for years. As I read many of the posts here, I am constantly impressed with how kind and sensitive a group is here. I feel such warmth and openness from everyone - I'm sure part of it is the anonimity of sitting at the computer, but that's not all of it. It's nice to spend a few moments with kind people. My heart is with you, and I hope you find what you are looking for. I have given up hope of that, and am trying to learn to find small bits of happiness where I can. I am sort of going the opposite direction, wishing I could truly be a hermit, live in the woods, commune with nature. I think I might find peace in a life like that, and it would help me stop hoping or expecting to some day have someone who loves and cares about me. Ah, here comes a little cat to assist me by lying on my arm as I type. So I DO have love in my life - it comes to me on four legs instead of two, but at this point I won't be choosey. Love to all - goodnight.

Hi Sum guy: Depression has been a major part of my life for over 10 years now too. I haven't been medicated or institutionalized, but its certainly kept me in "prison" one way or another. My holidays sucked too - I didn't go home because I was alone and didn't want to be around my brothers and their wives when I had no one. I'm sorry to hear about your relationship - I wish I had someone who loved me more than anything else in the world, that's more or less the main reason for my depression. I have everything else a person could want, great parents/siblings, my health, my looks, my home, success in career, but I'm still alone and feel like I'm going to spend the rest of my life this way. Bottom line is the rest of it doesn't add to much when you don't have someone to share it with does it? I'm sorry you're alone too - my heart goes out to you.

Sum_guy, Thanks you so much joining the group! We've been where you are and have had many of the same feelings and frustrations. You've come to the right place! I've only been here for about 2 weeks and it has been a great help to me already. Kelly

Sum_guy, You've come to the right place! Please feel free to roam the site at your own pace. If you look to the left of the screen under "PROGRAM TOOLS" you'll find our Depression Test. The purpose of these tests is to prepare you with information that you can present to your physician. When you're finished the test, you can either print your Final Report or email it directly to your doctor. If you ever have any questions or concerns please click the "CONTACT US" link at the bottom of the page. We're open to any questions or concerns you may have. Looking forward to hearing from you soon! Melanie ________________________________ The Depression Center Support Team

Sum_guy, Welcome to the site. I hope you find it useful. I too have been dealing with anxiety and panic attacks. I have gone from a social butterfly to an anti-social person and it makes me feel trapped and alone. Remember that you have gone through this before and that you will get better. Sharon

Hi, I'm new to online support. I live alone, I really don't have too many friends (maybe 3?, only 1 I can count on), I live in an isolated way. Depression has been a major part of my life for at least 10 years. I've been on almost every medication you can name. I've been institutionalized. I've had countless downward spirals and I've made numerous comebacks. I feel like I am a living irony. The holidays came and went, I didn't have family to spend them with, my intimate relationship with the woman I loved more than anything in the world ended or should I say transformed to friendship during this time. Another irony, this woman is my best friend and has bailed me out of deep emotional nightmares several times. Today I wound up having an extreme anxiety attack, near nervous breakdown, went to an emergency room, set up more appointments with psychologists and psychaitrists. And I repeat the process of regaining myself again. I feel sometimes I can be manic, sometimes deeply dark, anxious, countless other physical and emotional symptoms, but am still hopeful that someday my life will be as I want it to be. I know I need to fix myself, again, and if my experiences written here help anyone, it's certainly not wasted typing.