here is a suggestion:
run with it. say ok, my hair totally sucks. what is the worst thing that could happen? someone might think i was a total loser becuase my hair looks so bad. some guy might not want to date me. some other parent might think i am a terrible parent cause my hair is yucky. what a bunch of silly people they are. maybe i will cornrow it and see what happens.
i mean really, my hair is crap. oily and dirty. big deal. i will wash it and it will be frizzy and spastic-looking. big deal. doesnt make me a loser. doesnt make me a bad parent. doesnt make me a less lovable person. just makes me a person that isn't interested in spending a lot of time and money to make my hair look better. i spent $25 yesterday to get a deep condition. she said if i did it every week it would improve. HA! not gonna happen, $100 a month? no way! all those expensive hair cuts. expensive color weaves and highlights. expensive products. all that money hasn't fixed the problem, it apprently requires time and effort styling and ironing it. forget about it. i got better things to do. and better ways to spend my money. thinking that it looks like crap surely isnt going to improve it, but it does make me feel bad about myself. what have your negative thoughts done for you lately? i can tell you who benefits from all of our negative thoughts, though, the beauty industry. if they can convince that there is one standard of beauty and get us to chase it then they get big bucks. whiter teeth. straighter teeth. dermabrasion. facial peel. new clothes. new shoes. new car. new home furnishings. all of it preys on our low self-esteem. screw them, i am keeping my money, thankyou very much, who knows, i might feel better one day and want to celebrate in a tropical local! fight back people, dont get sold on the idea that you arent good enough. lets all save our money for an i-feel-good-about-myself-and-you-cant-stop-me celebration! ;p