You are so right about them not even smiling. I have some digital pictures from outings with friends (Birthday Parties, etc.) that I was reviewing recently. There are some, where he is in the background, with this horrible unhappy look on his face. It's scary to see. Again...I am hard on myself and thought it was because he was unhappy with me, but I don't think that is so.
He wasn't really "angry" but he was angry for him! He is very quiet and laid back, so to hear him complain about getting out of bed for work, not being as patient with me, getting irritated with waiters, etc. in public, etc. just didnt' make sense. I don't know if it was because he lowered his dosages or if he was just in a fallout...perhaps he is bi-polar?
I just don't know...it's so hard to understand any of this. He didn't talk to me about it at all...just said he had "anxiety." The only time I knew something was really wrong is when I woke up one night found him on the back porch crying with this heads in his hands saying over and over again "I'm broken...I'm so broken." I wish I had done something more. But he just closed up the next day and never spoke of it again (he had been drinking the night before when it happened.) I should have realized the severity of it all then...I wish I could help him, but he doesn't want to be around me or talk to me now, until he is "ready" he said. All I can do is pray for him. And we do, as you said, need to care for ourselves, too!