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11 years and counting

Timbo637

2024-10-31 6:49 AM

Quit Smoking Community

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Feels like hell week all over!!

Timbo637

2024-10-30 9:38 AM

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Roller Coaster Withdrawal

Timbo637

2024-10-14 12:28 PM

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Smile....and don't shoot the messenger

Timbo637

2024-09-27 3:17 PM

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Simulating and medication


9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I'm very pleased to hear that. I'm sure it will get better.

Davit
9 years ago 0 60 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I did my first try yesterday. I spoke with a new person by skype. It was strange. My thoughts were freezed most of time.
9 years ago 0 60 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Davit, thank you so much for your advice. It´s a great ideia. I´m getting courage to do it, it´s a great start to be more confidente in that situations.
9 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Aqua

I've spent the better part of my life alone, even when I lived with some one. Like last time. Six months and we never ate a meal together. Most times not even the same food or the same time. This happens. The time before we ate together and had nice candle lit suppers but did nothing else together but watch movies and shop. Not the answer either. 

I like people and have no trouble talking to them but it was not always this way. I would have been called shy. And because of this I have no kids. I never thought I would make a good Dad and I was afraid I'd pass on my disorder. Now I know that is stupid because anxiety and panic are learned, not inherited. Even if your parents have it it is still not inherited but learned. It can be changed. 

You could start by looking up chat rooms to practice interaction with people. Then move on to Skype and then video Skype. There are people from all over the world to chat with. It is good practice. I met my good friend Diane in a chat room and I was so scared of making a fool of myself. But it was so friendly. I have a friend in England and we Skype every night. Two people have stayed with me on their way to different lives. One lives forty miles away, one found a partner and got married. One has new friends in her new town.

Curing an anxiety disorder will give you the confidence to meet and talk to people. And it can be done. You could start by posting here more often. It is anonymous so you can say anything. Look at me, I blab all the time yet few people really know me. A couple from here do now. I was not always like that. I really was shy.

Davit
9 years ago 0 60 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Since it´s dificult for me to do real connections with people, I feel very alone. To increase that I leave alone, have no children. I still have hope I could find someone to create my own family.
I don´t know what do to, I think it´s normal I feel unhappy, like a normal person would feel in my situation. But it´s being very hard to eat every dinner alone, no one to talk.

10 years ago 0 11226 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Agua,
 
It can be hard for many people to connect with new people. It can take time to build confidence in new relationships. That being said if you are never able to get past this I can see how it would be debilitating.
 
It sounds like this is related to core beliefs to me. Don't give up on yourself! You deserve to enjoy social interaction. You deserve to form real connections. Exposure can be helpful - the more the better. But you might also want to ramp up your efforts. Attend support groups, find a therapist who specialises in social anxiety, research communications tips and techniques.
 
It sounds like working on being social would be a great goal for you. What specific goal do you think you want to set for yourself?
 

Ashley, Health Educator
10 years ago 0 60 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I have a goal related with social life, because I´m not able to create empaty with new persons. 
I can develop a conversation (making questions, etc) but I can not create interest in other person and be relaxed. When I try and make a short conversation, this person never contact me again to have another short conversation. I not feel relaxed and feel empty of issues to discuss in front of them. Other people seam to feel that, that I´m not with a good energy. 
I can force to create short conversations, but may be I don´t seam natural, and other people don´t enjoy contact with me. I also don´t enjoy, is something is not natural in me. I´m with lack of skills to comunicate because of my isolation.
When I force is not a good experience. I can try more times with the same person, but I can not see any evolution from me.
I only can make new friendships with extreme extrovertive personalities, they puy myself in a confortable state.
I think my problem is more related with depression and core beliefs. :(


10 years ago 0 11226 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Agua,

Is there another goal you can work on aside from stopping medication?


Ashley, Health Educator
10 years ago 0 60 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
 I´m continuing stuck in point 6. Since my goal of leave medication should take between 12-18 months, when should I start point 7 of the program ? I don´t know if I wait till finish my goal, or start right now. Everithing is running very good and I stopped having panick attacks. 

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