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unwanted thoughts & depression

10 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

rohit

The only reason you need support is for reinforcement and that is a good bit of what a therapist does. A good therapist doesn't hold your hand but leads you back to what you know is right. A good therapist leads you away from the core belief you don't want to the one you do but since you do the work and the ideas are yours it sticks better and is harder to ignore. You know that all I have done is read between the lines what I thought that you were saying what you thought was best for you. Mostly by seeing what was making you sad. By talking we have let you find out this on your own without pressure or influence except to lead you back to the path when you stray.

I think you still have a core belief about performance and so criticism hurts. You know that there are three things you can do with criticism. You can ignore it if it is wrong, you can learn from it or you can let it make you sad. Or you can do all three. In the end you want the first two but not in that order. Learn from it whether it is right or wrong and let it go. The third option is destructive.

There is a saying. "when you have no time then take your time and do it right because you have no time to do it over".

One thing at a time and move on only when you know you have it right. I think that if you do this you will be able to do more challenging things because you won't keep going back to unfinished business. Like building a house, it is only as strong as it's foundation. And that has been a hard lesson for me to learn. I know who I am. I'm proud of who I am. This is my foundation, I can build on this and I know what I want for me. What is best for me. You can and will do this too.

I am here for you to use as a sounding board to bounce your ideas and thoughts off of. If you do this they become clearer and easier to deal with.

Davit.

10 years ago 0 +0 / -0 101

Davit,

I read your post again & again.You come out with a wonderful conclusion.That I need

support for what I am doing; nd more that I dont want comments that hurts me.

If I get support for my work I am almost alright.

But support is not always there.There are a maximum of challanges & least of support.

Life is not so easy.I know this very well;I m very well aware of challanges of life.

But I tend to loose confidence drastically in challanging situations.

I just want to change myself but change is very slow & in a small magnitude.

So I avoid big roles & challanges. Avoidance is not a solution but it relieves me.

I have a mental peace now.

May be I can change myself for challanging roles.How ? its yet a big question.

Thanks Davit nd friends for your support here

rohit131

10 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12049

rohit,

Davit is wise!

CBT will gradually help you progress and yes the homework is important for understanding and knowledge. Take the time to familiarize yourself with our CBT and ask questions. There is a world of experience here and members are not shy is posting for assistance.

Step by step!

Josie, Health Educator

10 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

rohit

Seratonin is a chemical needed for thought, sometimes CBT works better with an SSRI because it is easier to think and the thoughts are better absorbed.

Davit.

10 years ago 0 +0 / -0 101

Sometimes I feel about it as a behaviour problem.But many times I think there is some chemical imbalance.

I am now seeing positive effects of medicine which I saw rarely in my last 17 yrs.I am able to manage things to a level.

But only medicine will not make u brave & happy.It is basically CBT which is needed to me.Constant challanging of your negative thoughts will definitely help to neutralize thoughts;if not positive.

But then sometimes I ask to God-why me ?

Thanks for the picture comment .

rohit131

10 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Oh by the way that is a very pretty very peaceful picture.

Davit

10 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

rohit

I believe this all started with a core belief that you have to follow elders influence no matter what. That because of this core belief and possibly other similar ones that spin off it that you will be easily hurt and easily depressed even if it is not your intended nature. It is still influencing your subconscious thought. You want to work on building a core belief that what you are doing and how you are doing it is right for you and right over all. (no matter what others think) You could build the wrong type of core belief because you are still easily influenced and want to please those important to you.

So let me influence you to get you started in the right direction. You are doing the right thing for you and those dependent on you. Keep doing it. I am not the only one that thinks this. Your depression is a reaction to the situation, it doesn't have to be there. It doesn't sound like the type of depression that is chemical. I think, and I could be wrong that you just need support for what you are doing and not unwanted comments that hurt.

Davit

10 years ago 0 +0 / -0 101

Today my boss in office discuss some thing which hurts me.She said why you always look so stressful & disturbed.U do not look happy.What negative is going with u along.Actually while doing my work I dont know when I started getting depressed.I think there is no reason behind this nd my nature is depressive.Previously depression was almost full day with strong magnitude;around 2 yrs back.Now still some traces are left although I feel much better & comfortable.Its like computer virus.It spreads without any message;without warning.I feel heavy headed & depression reflects clearly from my face.I want to get rid but seems difficult.

I don't know why it happens.My nature is depressive;may be negative core belief...or else what? need some home work to be done.

rohit131

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unwanted thoughts & depression