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Etiquette and Asserting Oneself - "Finger- Lickin´" Bad

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Etiquette and Asserting Oneself - "Finger- Lickin´" Bad

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Hugs

Check your by laws. In my area you can not put anything within three feet of the property line other than a fence. Not even a sidewalk. And even a fence has to meet code or it has to come down. Lucky us, there is a road between us and our nearest neighbour.

Davit.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4027

I wonder if anyone has had one of those patio umbrellas draping over on their side of the fence. The neighbour just put one up for the first time, and this year, it seems to be over the property line, on my parent's narrow lot. It's annoying, since I find their deck, which was built so close to our kitchen window, is invasive enough.

Mom thinks I'm petty, since our neighbours were so "generous" in the past. But mom doesn't realize I shovelled their snow for a decade, hours before they were even awake, every work day,as I commuted to work. I find they're really selfish, and have directly caused numerous issues, which I didn't notice since I was commuting, and too busy with work for so many years.

Fences, and property lines, make good neighbours, I say. I just wish I find the correct words to ask to move the umbrella back

Does anyone think that a property line is "unclear"? I did have a survey done 11 years ago, and both their fence and garage wall are crooked, so I'd like to "draw the line"

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4027

I dealt with one visitor, and will deal with another separately. Thank you Sunny.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1665

Hi Hugs: How about displaying a discreet sign informing visitors that someone has bad reactions to/is allergic to perfume? I've seen in homes where they display no smoking because of COPD right on the front door. Nowadays people usually smoke outside anyway. These reactions to perfume are very real and it should be okay to let people know without feeling badly. Maybe you could just put it on the door when you know people are coming over - or if they telephone first, you could mention, by the way, we'd appreciate no perfume please, because, etc. (I think you said family members forgot and used it. They could wash it off in the bathroom maybe?).

I've had that experience at church. ugh. sometimes I have moved away as I was getting headache and nausea.

Once there was a homeless person who sat right in front of me and I just couldn't bring myself to move because I didn't want to hurt his feelings. I thought he probably felt ostracized enough as the whole bench was practically empty. Oh dear, it was difficult though.

Sunny

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4027

Hi Bren,

Thank you for responding. Hope you had a great Easter!

I can move away in some cases. But sometimes I can't, and sometimes for my parent, she particularly can't move and I have to speak up for her.

An example would be for visiting relatives. It's just tough, since no-one want to offend anyone.

It's harmful to sit in a room with someone for two hours, and some people can end up in the hospital. Over a period of time, it does damage to a person too, like second hand smoke.

If I had the time, I'd start a movement with a slogan wearing a button, like "I won't fart if you don't wear perfume".

Bren, there are too many dishes to wash, so I can just fight these small battles, and move on.

Let Oprah(and Dr Oz) change the world

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 424

I too have such allergies to perfumes!

I can only use a tiny bit myself,and yes,i have sat many times in church,smelling a strong stench of this that would give me such a headace and my nose and eyes would run for hours after!

I still have this problem after all these years..

Now...i move away! i get up and move somewere elese!

Bren

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4027

What's the appropriate way to ask people not to wear perfume around people with lung diseases?

It's hard to believe some aren't aware of this, and family knows about it around my mom, to make it worse

Once someone asked someone to take perfume off in a prayer group, and it my first awareness of others sensitivity

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4027

Sunny & Vincenza,

I'll sleep better now. As for the children's situation, the children were very young toddlers I believe, so they'd be pretty sensitive.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1665

Hi Hugs: Well, personally, I wouldn't feel obliged to gift the supervisor as he/she isn't the one whom your mom knows who's bathing her.

As for the mother giving that advice to a colleague, I don't agree with that statement. I feel that this is the birthday child's special day, just as the other children will have their own special day. Heck, what's so special if everybody gets a present? I can understand at Christmas time or some such occasion when everyone usually receives something.

Having said the above, there is one occasion when I might differ. That is when a new baby comes home. Often it's nice to give the older siblings a little something too, especially if they are still young and might be a bit jealous at all the fuss the new arrival is causing - you know how a new baby gets all the attention.

just my thoughts,

Sunny

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 4027

My parent has someone come over and help with bathing, and to give me a break weekly.

If my parent's visiting homemaker has a supervisor, should I buy an Easter present for her too. The supervisor is visiting tomorrow, and is dropping in.

I forgot, since I've been under the weather, and just came home from shopping. I don't wish to make either feel uncomfortable, and the money isn't an issue.

I just remember a colleague being coached by a mom, to always gift children collectively, even when one doesn't have a birthday. Human nature is the same irregardless of age, and I guess I'd feel the same even though I'm "older".

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Etiquette and Asserting Oneself - "Finger- Lickin´" Bad