Hi Davit,
I am regimented, but intentionally to make up for the lack of balance, and my wandering mind, uneasiness. There are too many things that "need" to get done with timelines, like monitoring mom's meds, medical appointments.
I do try to get out every 3 days, but it ended up being 4 days to the gym for an hour. I don't have that "me" to restore equilibrium. It's important to do this, since I noticed I was really stressed today, after waiting 4 days to work out. One good thing is I'm taking tai chi tomorrow, but that's an experiment.
Without balance, I can't respond well. As I returned from the gym as I exited the car. I was defensive too, as I spoke to mom since I was annoyed that she didn't notice I left, by asking if I needed permission, but sometimes she is possessive.
I'm annoyed since I didn't get a response from an instructor on whether his course is running, and it filled up with one spot left. It's probably just as well, since I don't wish to add to my stress load, since it appears I haven't found the equilibrium I need to be okay.
I was told once by a trainer, in a job I eventually had to move from, that I couldn't write everything down. I'm aware I'm trying to simplify things by having lists and spreadsheets, but today I couldn't find form for something. As I plan to walk to the library, I'm aware of the past when I used to rush to the library at the last half an hour, especially near holidays, since I had little to console me except a book of information of some sort.
Remind me to restore that balance, Davit.
