Hi Sunny and Davit. Thank you for giving me more ideas. Davit, my agoraphobia with the shower right now is mainly do to the fact that I've associated the shower with panic attacks. But I am trying to figure out what any of my thoughts are about taking a shower that could be making me anxious also. And Sunny, when I take a shower I have the water hit my shoulders and back, the only time I stick my face in the water is after I have cleaned my face, so I don't think thats really a trigger for me, but now that you mention it, it does bother me a bit when I have to do that, something I'll have to work on. Thank you for your suggestions, they are really helpful, they give me some other ideas that maybe I haven't thought of. :D
And Davit, I forgot to mention that I used to have a problem with claustrophobia. From since I can remember when I was a kid until I believe my mid-teens. When I was a kid I remember freaking out when parents, uncles, etc. would throw a blanket over me cause they were just playing around with me. This might have a little to do with it also.
I just went a whole six days without an attack. Ah, that feels great! :D My anxiety level did sometimes raise to a 3 or 4 on those days, but I was able to use breathing and coping statements to calm myself down really easily. Today I ended up having a panic attack around 5:30 PM, bummer. It got to about a 5, maybe a 6, sometimes its hard to differentiate. They sure are hard to deal with when you haven't had one in a while. This one was a bit unexpected, I felt a spike in my anxiety, but then I thought I had calmed it down. But after about 5 minutes or so I noticed it a bit too late I suppose. I was able to stop it from going any higher though. I journaled, but this time I took a different approach. Usually I just journal what happened a bit before the attack and what is going on at the time. But this time I journaled about why I get the symptoms, how I don't have to worry about them, that they are not harmful, that I can accept that I'm having an attack and I'm having these feelings and thoughts, that me going through them and knowing that I am fine is just reinforcing that fact to my brain, and I can get through them now and in the future. It worked pretty darn good, a lot better than my earlier journaling. And then another attack tried to spring up on me around 8 PM, this time I was a bit more prepared for it and it only got to around a 3 or 4, but I did my new journaling technique and that's why I was able to keep it from going any higher and it was over with pretty quickly too.
I wanted to share this so that people could see what I started doing for my journaling, and maybe add this kind of technique into their current one or start doing something like this instead. And also for the new people in case they wanted a bit of insight of maybe how they could do their journaling. I hope this thread can give some good information and most importantly, some hope! :D
Today I decided to get a VIB drink that has 60 mg of L-theanine in it. I noticed that it does help me relax and be able to concentrate better. I drank it while on the way to class today and I was able to concentrate better and not be so worried about my anxiety or attacks. Plus my anxiety level has lowered a lot, I had a couple of attacks yesterday and my anxiety level was pretty high since waking up until a little after I had the drink. I do know my anxiety level is lowered and I feel more calm, but it feels like my mind isn't used to being like this, I feel "different" in a sense. I'm wondering if anyone has used L-theanine before and noticed this kind of feeling also, or if its pretty normal to feel different to this calmness that has come over them after being anxious for a while? Because I know that the mind is used to being in such a tense state when the anxiety is there that I'm assuming its probably normal and ok to feel a bit "different", but it would be nice to have some reassurance.
Davit, I have used it before when I was going through withdraws of the lorazepam. I noticed it did help me get through the withdrawal days better than when I had not been using it. I still had some disturbing thoughts and my anxiety level was still higher because I was withdrawing from the benzo. But I haven't used it in a while and noticed a much more calming effect because I'm not having the withdrawal symptoms. I know that in Asian cultures they drink a LOT more green tea throughout their whole lives without any bad side effects and have done a ton of research on it too. So I'm not really worried about there being any side effects, I just noticed I was feeling a bit "different" to the calmness, but right now I'm feeling pretty good and enjoying it. I'm not gonna rely on it to make me better, but I'm glad it can help me right now.
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