Selfishness, self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.
So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn't think so. Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kill us! God makes that possible. And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid. Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to. Neither could we reduce our self-centeredness much by wishing or trying on our own power.
Why is it we and our drinking are so affected by the opinions and behaviour of others? That's something I'm struggling with right now. Me and hubby are not right now outward fighting and the name-calling has stopped but... 3 couples asked us out last night to a dance we usually go to (and I've often stayed sober there). He said no because he says he's not ready to be in that venue with me 
. That hurt and boy oh boy did I feel like drinking.... luckily no alcohol in the house but I'm looking for some inspriation so that I can keep MY goals in mind and not be so easily affected by others. Anyone have any ideas?
