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15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 466

You really should give yourself a pat on the back with each task, scrap! (hope you don't mind if I shorten your name, it's easier to type and I mean no offense) What we overcome isn't easy, and the fact that we can face it has got to be worth a couple gold stars!

It isn't easy to go in to the doctor, took me 2 years to grow my kahunas before I actually went in! But in the end, only I could step up, face my fear head on and take that challenge. Wasn't fun, wasn't any fun for the first couple visits, but all in all, it was definitely worth it.

You have a great way of looking at things, particularly with the doctor you spoke to. Many don't understand exactly what it is we go through. My own family doesn't, but luckily they try to work with me. Find a doctor you're willing to work with, and if you feel it won't work, then remember you can always find someone else.

And congratulations on starting to pave your path!!! That in itself has gotta be 10, no 20 gold stars!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 23

It is funny how you almost want to give yourself a sticker with each new "task" or "challenge" that you can compleat even if you felt nervous you didn't back down and you compleated it.

It has kinda been a bad week - I thought I was doing well and I was even able to go to the store and buy some stuff for my son's birthday (I am ok with activities at home just not outside my home) then when my family and friend did their "intervention" I felt a flood of emotions and dark memories come back like I was reliving everything.

I felt bad today when I wanted to call the doctor and when I talked to her over the phone and explained that I was not sure if I could come in, she gave no remorse and was cold about the hole matter and I just cried and I felt like a huge idiot.

I then later had to remind myself that this was not her fault, she maybe doesn't suffer from this and is not maybe trained in that area to understand how I can feel. I also understood that I am also very emotional. So I have got over this and have at least started paving a way to get there to talk to her and see what kind of counselling is out there for me!

thank-you for your reply:)

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 466

Welcome to the board, Canscrapbook!

Understand your position all too well. I was the same way, always getting along with whomever came my way, never had problems with public speaking, all that stuff. Then slowly but surely turned into an agoraphobic. Inside all the time, I was called the same names, or at least very similar to yours. But, there is hope at the end of this tunnel...sounds kinda like you've already got some hope! Having your familiar intervene like that is awesome. Aint it great to have people who care in your life?

Anywho, the program they have here is awesome, and the people on the board are as well. Feel free to post whenever you want, we're pretty good at relating to anxiety in whatever situation.

Oh, congratulations on your first step, it's the hardest part of the journey! Cheers!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 23

Hello

I have not read any posts as of yet but thought I would intro myself!

I thought I had a very good life, never had a problem with public speaking and was always called a social butterfly until one day I was overcome with this horrible feeling. an hour later I had a severe tooth ache. I went to the dentist and had a rootcanal and was back and going then these feeling kept occuring. I had to quit my job, I thought I was just over-worked. then the stomach aches started. then I was affraid to leave my home and now I have gained over 30 pounds in 16 months!

I was to the point where I would not walk my kids to school, go to their plays, soccer games and so on. My boyfriend (we have been together for 7 years and my as well call ourselves husband and wife) can't understand what is going on with me and would get frustrated. then he started getting to the point where he would start covering for me and protecting me. I felt like I was pushing all my friends and family away. Even my children would tease me saying I don't like to do anything and I'm boring. My sister would tease me and call me lazy and a hermit. That hurt so much because I thought she of all people would understand what I was going through.

Then last week my mom, sister and best friend (who I just figured hated me because I would never do anything with her) came over and did an "intervention" on me. I was hurt but so proud at the same time that people do care for me and my sister finaly understand what I was going through. My best friend is very involved with CAS and takes many workshops. She told me I can't just "get better" and that I do need help and that they would all be there for me in any way shape or form. The biggest thing she did was explain to my hubby what I was going through and what he needs to do to help me.

So here I am writing this out and looking to get my little social butterfly life back and to be the mom who goes on those field trips and helps at school!

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