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17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1904

I've decided that if I do not reward myself for this daily grind, smoking may seem more rewarding then quitting. Reward yourself, honey. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 7/11/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 34 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,365 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $251.6 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 3 [B]Hrs:[/B] 9 [B]Mins:[/B] 54 [B]Seconds:[/B] 22

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1904

It would really help if I could see those internal organs. It's like I just have to have faith that they are being damage. No. I do not want to smoke. But I need to HALT. Can't sleep tonight. I'm on the West Coast of the USA. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 7/11/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 36 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,457 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $266.4 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 3 [B]Hrs:[/B] 15 [B]Mins:[/B] 24 [B]Seconds:[/B] 24

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3131

thank you N2K I know all of that in my conscious mind, buttttt, I can't stop this feeling of not being myself (sometimes) so I'll keep working on it. Shevie thank you for your advise it's appreciated. Thank you Josie. I will continue one day at a time :)Marie [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 6/13/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 61 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 921 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $244 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 30 [B]Seconds:[/B] 58

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3131

Hi, yesterday I had a wonderful day, had my hair done, thought about the cig there, but not for long it was ok I figured I've been here now as a non-smoker new memories, it's fine. We were invited to dinner at my friend's house (both smokers), it made me think of a cig sure but not that bad I chewed my straws and was ok, they smoked outside and it didn't smell too much, I delt with it. Today we're invited to dinner at other friends house (non-smokers) no temptation wonderful dinner, wine, great conversation, well all evening I felt figgety, needed to get up a lot, thought about smoking, felt I was deprived of something, I didn't want to smoke really I don't I just want to feel good about not smoking, it's difficult to write how I feel, I have made up my mind smoking is not an option and I repeat this in my head often and it works usually, tonight I felt lost not smoking, I didn't know how to interact without it. As soon as I got home I came here to post hoping I would feel better, what is this I go to smokers' house and I'm ok, I go to non-smoker's house and I'M not. Pretty confusing, I hope this makes sense, to someone really because it doesn't to me :confuse:Marie hope someone is still up !!1 [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 6/13/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 61 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 916 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $244 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 1 [B]Mins:[/B] 16 [B]Seconds:[/B] 28

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3131

Hurstk, that makes a lot of sense, I think that once we put this thing into the ground for good, we will do better. So to the task at hand. I have been feeling a lot better this afternoon and tonight, I needed distractions. So we continue one day at a time and thanks for your post Hurstk ;)Marie :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 6/13/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 61 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 929 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $244 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 10 [B]Seconds:[/B] 33

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3131

N2k LOL I didn't really read the last phrase about social stigma hhahahahahah. I just read the beginning and thought I know all this(impatience) I just want to feel good now. You see this is my personnality, things have to be done yesterday and done well so I'm working on that as well, I feel so much better now LOL Lol :)Marie [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 6/13/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 61 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 929 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $244 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 4 [B]Mins:[/B] 4 [B]Seconds:[/B] 6

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2838

You know what I think, Marie? I have come to the conclusion that I am "grieving" the "smoking" me. I have decided that I am not going to smoke, but that I am going to allow myself some times of depression to "grieve". Cigarettes were such an important part of my life for so long, that, just like a partner, I am going to have to "grieve" the loss--like a death. And that's OK, you know...? As long as I know that I have laid that part of me to rest...and just like a REAL death of someone you care for, it will get easier with time. Is this SICK thinking, or do you think it makes sense?

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2838

Thanks Marie for your validation. That is the conclusion I came to when I really wanted to smoke when my kids were, and continue to, act up so badly. That I am simply mourning the death of the "smoking" me. It made sense to me at the time, and continues to. I went through such a hard few weeks, and that is how I saw myself. Oh well..you made me feel better! :) Another weekend behind us and a brand new week of brand new and challenging obstacles!!! What a pessimist I am! :blush: LOL

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3368

Hey Hurstk ... when it is time to totally lay him in the ground and have his funeral ... invite me. I love watching ol' nicodemon get buried. ;p [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/12/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 94 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,820 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $376 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 7 [B]Hrs:[/B] 21 [B]Mins:[/B] 49 [B]Seconds:[/B] 29

Quit Meter

$54,513.60

Amount Saved
Quit Meter

Days: 5957 Hours: 8

Minutes: 37 Seconds: 49

Life Gained
Quit Meter

45428

Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter

136,284

Cigarettes Not Smoked

17 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3368

I felt weird not knowing how to act without smoking at first it seemed like. I felt like I was naked in social situations without my smoke. The more you practice being in social situations the less you feel WEIRD. It just takes time. It takes making those non-smoking memories on top of those old smoking memories. You just keep on keeping on Marie. You'll be an ol' pro in no time! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/12/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 93 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,819 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $372 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 7 [B]Hrs:[/B] 21 [B]Mins:[/B] 42 [B]Seconds:[/B] 33

Quit Meter

$54,513.60

Amount Saved
Quit Meter

Days: 5957 Hours: 8

Minutes: 37 Seconds: 49

Life Gained
Quit Meter

45428

Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter

136,284

Cigarettes Not Smoked

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