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I can never achieve my goals


18 years ago 0 7 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey MRB, thanks for your support, i think i was setting myself goals that were impossible for me to do at this stage. I will set some goals that are alot easier and i'll see how i get on. It is still very difficult for me at the moment but i will do my best. Cheers. Chris.
18 years ago 0 40 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Chris I was very interested in your posting and sorry to hear about your difficulties. In a way this is a problem that often arises with "goal setting" particularly when depressed - what happens if I fail to achieve that goal? I think we have all done something similar to what you have done and felt guilty and even more depressed than we did before - "after all I can't even do THAT properly!" You also mention about being tired, wanting to sleep all the time etc, and these of course are very common symtoms of depression, and are sometimes even caused by the medications used to treat it. Against that background, setting a goal of getting up at 7 am, although commendable, does seem to me, if you don't mind me saying so, somewhat unrealistic and not likely to be achieved. As setting that type of goal isn't working for you, and is indeed making you feel worse, why not simply abandon, for the time being at least, setting these goals? The real problem here seems to be your feeling tired and wanting to sleep all the time, and I wonder if you should address this problem first, before goal setting etc. I don't know if you are receiving any medical or psychological help, or are on any medications. If you are on medications for your depression it could be that you are on the wrong ones for you, and that they are making you sleepy or not having a sufficient antipressant effect. Some antidepressants can in fact have an energising effect, and I do think it might be a good idea to discuss these matters with a doctor. I also think that setting goals is sometimes seen as a "chore", extremely onerous. This really is not what we want. Forget THOSE sorts of goals totally and utterly! And really it doesn't have to lead on to feeling guilty, or a failure etc, because in a way you HAVE achieved something - you have discovered that something that you've tried doesn't work. That is valuable information. It means don't do that again at present - DO SOMETHING ELSE. Set yourself the "goal" of feeling better about yourself, feeling good. Forget all other goals as they are trivial in comparison, and as you have said don't work anyway. Ask yourself, "What do I need to do or what help do I need to get to achieve this?" THIS one goal ONLY. It will lead on to action
18 years ago 0 7 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi there, if i set myself a goal, for example, get up at 7am on weekdays, i never end up doing it. I always wake up at about 10:30AM. If my mother wakes me up, i always fall back to sleep somehow. I have a few other goals too, like going for a walk every day around the block, but it never happens, maybe once in a while but i can't do it regulary. These are only a couple of the goals that i struggle to do. When i think about how i haven't achieved my goal for the day, i feel even more depressed with guilt. Alot of people say to me, just build it up step by step, but i can't even achieve the first step! I always just want to go to sleep all the time. I don't know what to do to pull myself out of it. Thanks for lisening. Chris

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