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depression and pregnancy

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1288

Members, thank you so much for sharing with us! Sylvie, Bilingual Health Educator

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 5195

Madara, As a mother of 3 (ages 21, 14 & 6), I can tell you that nothing keeps me going and getting up every day more than my children. My older children are the successful portion of my life. My six year old gives me the doubts and challenges that make me wonder if he would be better off without me. I realize that they don't have anyone but me. I believe that God is the only one who decides when we are ready for children and how many we can have. I had trouble conceiving all three of my children. After years of effort I had an eptopic pregnancy and because of the damage done, I was told I wouldn't be able to have any more children. I have had two sons since that time. Look at the age span of my kids. Obviously I didn't plan on having the 6 year old when I had a 15 and 8 year old. It was God's will for some reason (I still don't know why). Children are blessings from God. Every last one of them. Follow your heart. Do not let your problems with depression control your life. I know easier said than done. This is just my opinion. Take what you want and leave the rest. Lady

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

HI MADERA, I have come a long way from the young woman who saw pregnancy as a parasitic infection ... to having two children of my own. If I could have done one thing differently I would have chose to have a better control on my depression before having my children! I do not know where i would have turned out to be... but there were so many difficult moments when I wanted to die. There were so many nights that I watched my littles breathing and was convinced that their lives would hurt for the moment and would turn out so much better without me... I prayed to the Mother to take me. I begged Her to come and take my soul from this walking corpse and give the energy to my children to have a happy life. There were times I wondered when will I begin to feel that happiness that other mothers -normal mothers- feel. What will loving my children feel like? When will I get there?? When will I smile at my baby's smile and feel happy? Looking back ... there are a few precious moments that I remember. The softness of my son's baby lips. The tiny warmth of my premature daughter. ... there are also many storms and rains. My doubts, my pain, my illness. I do not want to discourage you Madera. I only want to remind you that parenthood put a lot of stress on a person and A LOT of stress on a couple. If you wait a while and get yourself stable and functioning again it will all be for the better. In Montreal we say ... if you do not like the weather wait 10 minutes. I guess we could go the next step and say that if you work past the winter of your depression spring is around the corner.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 144

it's Ok. I even didn't have to tell her that I was disappointed, somehow while speaking we got till pregnancy topic again and she said some day I will have kids.... I hope...

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 144

Danielle, I agree with you and I think I will talk to her that her reply disappointed me and see what happens.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 8760

Madara, I'm not sure what prompted this response but and we've talked about this before, your depression shouldn't limit your choices but should cause you to approach them carefully to prepare well for the changes that will follow. You may want to talk to her about her comment, letting it fester could hurt the professional relationship you hold with her. Danielle, Bilingual Health Educator

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 144

Lately I have changed my psyxhoterapist and yesterday we have talked about possible pregnancy (I was the initiator) but she said that "until I have all these fears, I should/must not get pregnant"... that made me cry... I don't know how and when I will have less these fears She says I understand everything about my illness, but that is only in my brain, I cannot accept it with my soul

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

Hi, I lived through two very different pregnancies, one miscarrage, and two VERY different post-partum periods. My Son is 9 yrs and my pregnancy with him was great till the second echographie... when I was told I would need a c-section (I was brainwashed ;p into beliving that natual was the only way!) and I crashed for a month... but I was okay at the birth. Post partum down lasted a whole two days (I was really afraid of being along) and then I got into a routein and was fine. Two years later we wanted a second child and had a few problems conceiving... and at 12 weeks I had a miscarrage... I needed weekly sessions to let go of the guilt and horror (my baby died at 8.5 weeks!) My daughter (now 4) came along when I was not expecting her and had a miserable pregnancy (my uncle and father died that year) I had all sorts of symptomes -vomiting, moods, hot flashes, WORRIES- then "Tiamat" arrived 5 weeks before my due date at 2.5kgs and at birth had severe allergies to soya and beef proteins! She was a Spit-fire that would not let anyone come near her but maman! and I had all sorts of appointments with her. And the two of them are the absolute joys of my life. When I hit the very bottom and think that their lives would be better without me making everything wrong... I get a kiss and a hug (from both) and they remind me that the (gross peine) the big sadness will pass. And they love me --- as I am.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 14

Madara: My husband and I had one beautiful healthy boy and wanted to have a second child. Unfortunately I had a miscarriage and my depression soared out of control. I still wanted to have another baby but I was really concerned about whether or not I would be able to cope. Eventually I did get pregnant again and it was wonderful. I was a little stressed during the first few months, but I made sure to take good care of myself (eating well, getting exercise and sleeping) and when I started to feel the baby move, I forgot all my worries. The baby growing in my belly was a constant reminder of the miracles of life and the sweet innocence of childhood. I did have some post-partum depression and since have had other challenges with my MDD, but I wouldn't trade anything for my wonderful children. I don't know if this helps, but I do know what a positive influence my children have in my life. It is not always easy when I am not feeling well, but I have great support from my husband and we always make it through.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 144

Yeah, I am also waiting :) :) :)

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depression and pregnancy