Thank you Ashley, Vincenza, and Hugs for taking the time to write and let me know you are thinking of me..This support may seem like a little thing to someone else but to me it is quite Big and your support really does make a different a huge difference for me and it makes me stronger..
Speaking of little things..Yesterday was a pretty normal day for me and I enjoyed doing the little things around the house, like doing my laundry so I could get ready for my afternoon Dr. appointment. I took comfort in these tasks and the normalcy of it all..Who would think that doing laundry would bring such comfort..
The afternoon was a challenge for me with the Dr. appointment it was a very late appointment..She is a bit of a alarmist and did scarce me a bit saying there should be a vascular surgeon on call if problems arise during my surgery..We meaning all of us the doctors and I know that my surgery will be a challenge because of the location of the mass in my kidney. It is not going to be a easy one. I told her I had confidence in my surgeon that it would be ok..Even so she did get me to worrying. She also wanted to know if he was sending me over to oncology which means to the cancer doctors. I told her no not yet their is a 20% chance that is not cancer and we will not know for sure until after surgery and the pathology report comes in. She said that was a very positive way of looking at it. The one good thing she did say was that she felt if need be that I could live for many years with my one very good kidney..So that was good news.
I have to tell you this was a very challenging afternoon and I am sure that everything that I have learned here on the site has helped me to get though all of this..Working the cbt program here has really helped me challenge the negative thoughts that have been thrown my way. It is a challenge every day and yes there will be many more challenges ahead..I guess what I am trying to say is that working an doing cbt is a ongoing process and that no it will not make the negative things that come up in life not happen because that is life, negatives do happen to everyone at sometime, but what cbt does do is give you the tools to challenge your negative thoughts about these situations so that you can move forward in a positive direction..
Anyway today I am going to focus on doing some normal things around the house. I really love all those little things now..
Thats about it for now. Thanks for listening and for responding and letting me know you that you care and that you are here and listening.
Red...