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Desperate

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2101

Hello Lisa,

I understand the feeling like talking about this will make it worse or will make you panic. But in the long run, the more info your family has the better they can understand and support you. It is worth trying. Plus I agree with Gene, the less you avoid the better it is in the long run.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 187

Hi Lisa

Don't stop trying to avoid. This program will give you great tools for dealing with avoidance issues. It is an integral part of the program and I am sure you will gain a lot from persisting with it. My counsellor (who I have also paid for by myself) kept insisting that I do not avoid the places that I fear. Boy did that pay off! I now no longer have an specific activities that makes me panic. The only time I have anxiety attacks now is when I am completely alone. But otherwise activities such as driving don't phase me.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 13

Thanks all, My hub does know and in those first awful weeks I wasn't able to keep it to myself. I think deep down he knows how bad it is but accepts my good day/bad day because its easier for him to deal with, I think he may feel some guilt because it started after he almost drowned on the last day of our holiday, the signs were there before that though I just think that tipped me over the edge. I spoke to a counsellor that I paid for myself, I only went once because I wasn't comfortable with him, I'm on the waiting list for counselling through the GP but don't know how long that will take. I don't feel comfortable outside, I get butterflies before I go and just cope, I can't drive very far on my own either but I'm trying so hard not to avoid. When I say lose control I think I mean I won't be able to control my panic, don't really know what I mean or think anymore

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 150

And yes, I know what you mean when you say that talking about it will make you lose control.

It's understandable. Given that you have been suffering in silence, what will you be letting lose when you talk about it?
I had similar thoughts.

Before I told my partner what I was going through and opened up, I thought that if I spoke about it, I would have no control over my emotions. I thought I might just burst into tears and not be able to function because I'd exposed myself. My weakness.

Also, it's like self-affirmation. If you admit to someone else what you're going through - it's like admitting defeat. That's how I felt anyway. Like if I said it out loud, it would make it true...

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 150

Lisa,

Do you feel that bottling all this up, hiding away how you really feel/are - do you feel like you are living a lie to your family?

I mean, do you ever just want to sit them down and say that you feel as though you are falling apart?

I had the same experience with my girlfriend at the time of first suffering panic attacks. I didn't want to 'burden' her. But there are two cliche sayings:

A problem shared is a problem halved.

If you do not give the person you love the chance to share your pain, you do not give them the chance to love you fully.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1693

Lisa,

You have received some great advice from darkblue!

You mentioned that being outside is slightly better. As darkblue said, focus on this! People's coping strategies can be so unique. But by finding a technique or strategy that works well for you, you will be able to overcome this.

How have you found the program thus far? This program is 12-weeks and involves the tools and supportive tests. Each session is based on the previous session, so we strongly advise that you work slowly through the program and not jump ahead.

Stay close to the boards Lisa and continue to let us know how you are doing. We are here for you!

Breanne, Bilingual Health Educator

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 13

thanks for replying, I don't really feel better outside, more like i manage better outside i suppose, my kids do know but they don't understand, does anyone who hasn't been in the position? I know they've been worried and that made me worse, same with hubby too he drives for work and so I don't want to worry him either. My family are good and I have a great best friend who I can call anytime but I sometimes feel that talking about it will make me lose control if that makes sense?

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 150

Hi Lisa.

It must be hard trying to keep this hidden from your children. Do they know what you are currently going through?

You aren't superwoman. And I'm sure they know that you are only human, and it can get too much at times.

It's great that you feel better outside. Capitalise on it. Make time to be outside and relax. Schedule some time just to be out without a purpose. Just to clear your mind.

But do keep working on the program. It's not all about exposing yourself to the outside. It's just that being scared of going out is very common in panic disorder. The progam deals with everything panic related.

Remember that sometimes your panic will come and go in cycles. Don't be disheartened when it does come back. It doesn't mean that you are getting worse, it's just the way it goes.

Keep in touch with us.

DB.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 13

Forgot to say, I signed up for the program but I don't see how its gonna work for me, I'm as bad at home as I am out, slightly better out maybe with the distractions, I'm exposing myself at home nearly all the time.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 13

Feel really desperate at the moment, seem to be living in terror since yesterday morning when I got up feeling anxious, sleeps gone bad after seeming to improve a bit. I'm either feeling like I'm gonna lose it or have horrible physical symptoms I can't ignore. Trying not to take a tranq, they're on a when you need them basis now but I've needed them since I got up this morning. I'm also on 20mg citalopram for about 3 weeks. I've got 3 kids and although they are 16,13 and 12 I know they worry so I can't show anything, sometimes feel so desperate, I can't be doing this for much longer, can anyone relate and tell me it DOES get better???

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