Hi Matilda,
Yes we are in different time zones, I live in the US so I think you are a few hours ahead of me. Happy New Year too you too.
Actually I had a pretty good night last night, I was actually laughing and dancing around with my son and watching the neighbors fireworks, for a few hours it "all went away" I felt something I have not felt in a long time, happy and peaceful with hope for the future, 2011 was such a hellish year for me I guess I was so happy to see it go, for a brief time I felt optomistic and hopeful.
I could not fall asleep till about seven o'clock this morning, my husband was snoring horribly! He had a few egg nogs and rum and he does not usually drink hard liqour just beer, his snoring kept me up all night, which means I overslept of course, but I did sleep some. Today some of the old feelings came creeping back, I SO want to hold on to those few brief hours last night when I was NOT worrying about strokes and heart attacks and illness disease dying and death, that was so nice to let it go, I felt almost normal, today I feel like "hung-over" and I did not drink anything alcholic, just water, it was strange I feel very tired and out of sorts, I think I am so hoping and praying that this new year will not repeat the last, it was so hard to survive ten months of sheer terror and panic and took so long, and that relaspe on Christmas day did not help, I want too keep my expectations low, like Sunny said my body has been through the wringer and it takes time to recuperate, she said by Spring I would be better, gosh I hope so, that was music to my ears, too hear there IS a end too this fear worry and pain.
I feel like you feel today also, headachy and out of it, I have been having these nightly headaches and I dont know what they are, like in my temples and eyes, not migraines, hopefully just tension, trying not to dwell and worry about them, which is hard for me, I am going to try to walk tonight, I did not last night because the fireworks and the dogs dont mix very well.
Did anyone else ever have headachs a lot during recovery, like eye-strain and temples that moved too the sides and back, my old nurse {who was wonderful and helped me a lot but she moved far away} called them cluster headaches and said not too worry, but they are coming a lot, hate too say it but the ONLY thing that makes them go away is a nap, but my husband hates when I nap, said I should just sleep at night, and my therapist says not too nap because I am using it for an "escape" from life, but if it helps why not? I know my Aunt told me when her grandson had a bad sore throat and he just looked at her and said "I just want too sleep so it does not hurt anymore" I so can identify with that, sleep is about the only thing that helps.
Is that bad to sleep a lot? Just so my head wont hurt and I do not have too think scary things, I dont have bad dreams during my naps, sometimes I feel I sleep better during my short naps than I do during my regular sleep, strange isn't it, I hate headaches but tylenol does not really help, and too much is not good for you, does anyone else get bad headaches, and does a nap help? I dont think my husband and therapist should make me feel gulity about it, if they had my symptoms and life they would sleep a lot too. I hope all the members and moderators had a wonderful New Year, may we all have a happy peaceful recovery one.