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Feel like I´m going backwards


12 years ago 0 26 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
It's been a while sense I have posted something I'm dealing with a major setback and I need your help I'm having more and more anxiety these days it feels like I'm going backwards instead of forward I feel like everything I have done all my homework and exposure helped and it's like I forgot everything I have read because I'm in that same place of anxiety but worst. I have a boyfriend and I have been with him for 5 years now and I have never told him about my panic disorder I was able to go out with him and now I don't know why I can't anymore I get big panic attacks like if I just met him. I can only go out with someone in my family and if they come with me than I can go with him I don't know what's wrong with me he is the love of my life how can it be so scary to go out with someone that I have known for so long? It scares me to think that we can get married and I'm afraid of being with him because he might leave me somewhere to wait for him maybe in the car or while he goes to the bathroom am I going crazy? Please help me.
12 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Nat.

Remember I said you can not remove anything from memory. Your memory of previous panic attacks even though subconscious and fought against is still there. It is common as a person progresses to think about "what if they come back" which brings them back to the surface where they are more accessible. Fact one. They did happen. Fact two. They can happen again. Fact three and this is the only important one. They don't have to.

Fact one. They happened because people in our condition have overrode the natural tendency to think positive and let the survival side rule. Negativity is almost always based on survival.

Fact two. We need to have some form of survival skill, unfortunately survival skills are negative.

Fact three. You survived the attacks before, you can again. Ignore fact one and two and concentrate on fact three. The fact that you did it once means you can do it again. Save fact one and two for when you really need them.

Do it again with medication if necessary so you can reinforce the positive in your memory. 
Admit to yourself that because it is still in your memory that it is going to be hard and imperfect the first time you try again. Use perception. You are doing this because you want to, not have to. Want to is positive. Have to is negative. Accept what you get. That is positive. Dwelling on any failure is negative and breeds negative thought and makes it harder.

Look at wrestler, he wants to do it. He knows he can. He is doing it even though he is uncomfortable because he knows that every success is adding positives to his memory burying the negative thoughts that want to come up.

Do this and eventually you will have a hard time remembering that you ever had a panic attack. They will fade to the back of your memory and stay there if you let them.
Help this process by thinking only positive things like how good it was and how much better it can be. And believe. Really believe because I am not lying. It can and will really go away. It can also come back, but only if you let it.

Davit.  
12 years ago 0 11215 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Nat,
 
This is what we call a set back. Set backs are common and actually important to the learning process.  The key is to take the positive out of it. What did you learn from this? What will you do differently next time? What more work needs to be done?
 
Consider these questions and post your thoughts. 
 
 
Ashley, Health Educator
12 years ago 0 5 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hello everyone,
 
I think I'm going backwards in progress. I have had a few panic attacks while doing exposure and ran home. I really really tried not to but the compulsion was overwhelming. I suppose I'm beating myself up about it for not sticking it out. The problem I'm having is that I know on an intellectual level that I'm not going to faint/collapse/ die/ explode etc but in the midst of the ball of panic all I can think is that this will happen. Today's panic attck has left me quite shaken to be honest and I feel that I'm no nearer in progress than where this all started in earnest about 6 weeks ago. I would very much like to hear of any advice people have about this. Thank you for listening.
 
Nat

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