This summer, when my daughter was away at camp and I first began experiencing great anxiety, I explained to my eight-year-old son that I was feeling sad and nervous. He was, in fact, very helpful and gave me lots of hugs and one day told me that I should focus on "right now" and to be happy that we were together (I don't know where he came up with these wonderful things to say!)
When my daughter came home, my anxiety lessened a huge amount but it has resurfaced in the last few weeks. She is 11 and I explained to her that sometimes I get nervous or scared or sad and not always for a reason that makes sense. She enjoys practicing progressive relaxation techiniques with me and after the first time that we did those together she remembered a visualization/relaxation "game" they played at camp. I sometimes suggest we play this game if I am having a bad day on a weekend. We had some gloomy and rainy weekends and my anxiety was high.
I don't know if being so open was the correct choice or not. You've reminded me that I need to be aware of their feelings and any anxiety that they have. I love Davit's shopping bag of positive ideas. One thing that I am going to be sure to start is to give my kids plenty of positive ideas for their "shopping bags" and to make sure that they have lots of wonderful things to think about.
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