I was advised to take a leave of absence because of my emotional condition, but I couldn’t cope with the toxic work environment, the bullying and my sense of burnout, coupled with the humiliation of returning. Others had taken various kinds of sick leave, including one person who took stress leave, but I just threw in the towel, and am bitter now, and trying to make the most of it. My parent was quite ill too, but my panic cycle was so bad, I wasn’t reachable, and just needed to get out.
Some days like today, I wake up angry and disappointed, when I see the world coping, and have to adjust my fear goggles. I waiver between wondering whether I made the right or wrong decision, and seem to be continuing to flounder, wondering whether I’ll get over the treatment of leaving without any acknowledgement for a lifetime of work with integrity and professionalism.
Knowing 25% of people are bullied doesn’t make it better. I had to give up a lot financially, professionally and the residual feelings aren’t helpful.
