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Feeling like I am spiraling out of control...

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Feeling like I am spiraling out of control...

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 14

I went through this with my first child too, but it was a little different. I seem to be getting slammed a lot harder this time and while I am happy about the new baby I feel surreal and a really heavy blanket of despair over me most of the time. These feelings do not reflect how I feel about the baby at all. I live kind of far away from evryone and I have tried to pull as many people close as possible for support. I ride out the bad moments as good as I can. Has anyone else here ever experienced that feeling of despair during panic? I keep praying that God will help me through this and I know he will...it is hard to talk myself through each day sometimes as I feel out of it most of the day. I hope today will be different and this feeling will fade into something more like normal...

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 376

Hiya Maggierose ... I love your name as I have two beagle sisters, one named Maggie and one named Rose!

Just wanted to let you know that I had high anxiety and then periods of depression both times I was pregnant. Partly hormones, partly a tendency toward mood disorders even before pregnancy. The doctors would not let me take any medication at all. It was tough. But, we all made it through. My daughter went through the same during her pregnancies (she does not have underlying mood disorder). She feels it really helped that she had me to talk her and dh through the rough times. Do, by all means, keep coming here, keep working the program, but get out and about, ask for help, get a babysitter, etc. Lots of good suggestions have been offered. Let people know how they can help and keep us posted :)!

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1

Yes, they do. My wife is six months pregnant, her experience was that it got better in the second trimester. Her friend was fine through the pregnancy but found the first few months after the birth difficult.

I'm not sure if the feelings stopped completely, or if they came to terms with them and realised that they weren't a barrier to a happy life, or some combination of both.

But where I'm headed is that you're allowed to find motherhood difficult and anyone with any feeling will probably be sympathetic. Well, my wife does have one friend who just wanted to smoke cigarettes with her and go to the pub. But in general, sympathetic.

All our friends who have had kids say that they strongly recommend joining birthing classes - they don't teach you anything you couldn't learn in a book but you meet other people who are going through the same thing as you.

Also if you know anyone who knits, I recommend getting your order in. Regardless of how you and I feel on a day to day basis, a new baby is a source of happiness and happiness is for sharing.

All the best

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1665

Hi Maggierose: What a beautiful present you will receive at the end. Can you keep your focus on the goal? I know, I'm making it sound easy, I know it isn't. I have three children but luckily I mostly enjoyed my pregnancies. Cdn. Guy makes some good suggestions about talking it out with some close friend or a loving mother, aunt. They'll love to fuss over you and make you feel good. Are you able to go for walks? Maybe a walk every day, get some fresh air, some sunshine will be helpful. Can you have an evening out with girlfriends once in awhile, just for a coffee break or something like that? That would be a break in routine and bring some positive, happy vibes.

My daughter went and still goes to what is called "Rhyme Time" with her 3-yr. old during her second pregnancy. It is once a wk. and meet up with other mothers and babies. I think it's only about an hour and a half or so. She has made some nice friends there. I remember I used to exercise during my pregnancy too. If you look up the net, you will find these exercises easily enough. Exercise is a great way to boost mood.
Just some ideas which might help take the hormone moods away for awhile. Keep the faith.

Your friend, Sunny

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 89

Never been pregnant, obviously, but my son's mom went through some wicked mood swings. If you have friends or family that you can talk with about these things, that could help. Especially if they've gone through pregnancies.

It might not hurt to talk with your doctor as well. Maybe ask to see a counselor as well.

I read a couple books for expecting dads to help me prepare for this kind of thing. That helped. Maybe going through that book, "What to Expect When You Are Expecting" could help as well. Weird stuff will still happen, but at least knowing what can happen could take away from the shock of it all.

Hormones can definitely do weird things to us. Having a baby is both one of the most amazing and wonderful things we can experience and also one of the most stressful and terrifying things we can experience. But after 9 years, I can say it was worth it! When my son pretended to give me sunshine after it had been cloudy and freezing for so long and I was bummed out, well...in a way he really did give me sunshine!

That kind of moment, and many more like it, will happen for you.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 14

I think my hormones have kicked in high gear and I am having a difficult time dealing with it. I keep having feelings of despair and complete hoplessness with anxiety/panic. I am not sure why pregnancy does this to me, other than hormones. I am hoping that it will level out some in the second trimester. Does anyone else ever feel these feelings with panic attacks? Has anyone else experienced this with pregnancy and did it get better after the first trimester???

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Feeling like I am spiraling out of control...