Hi, i'm new here. My story is a little different. I have always been very anxious but i never really had bad panic attacks. I started to get one every now and then when i was home alone early in the morning. My bf goes to work very early in the morning, i don't work, i'm on disability. Anyway I used to get panicky because i was up because i don't sleep well at night. When he would leave i would get panicky, palpitations, couldn't breathe, head would feel funny, like lightheaded and i would get up and run to the window to get air, then pace around the apartment feeling very scared (of what i don't know). I thought i was losing it. Then my bf's 17 yr old neice moved in with us and she is pregnant (we found out 2 weeks after she moved in). My anxiety went through the roof, as well as my depression. My main diagnosis is major depression. I would say it is treatment resistant as well. I am an introvert too so having someone around me all the time is not good for me. I can take my bf because we have lived together for years and i am used to him, he is my family. But having her move in really upset me and i haven't been the same. I am having attacks all the time, as a matter of fact, i am in a constant state of anxiety with all of the symptoms i just described. I don't know how to deal with this. This is not like a fear, like afraid of heights, or driving, or spiders, or crowds. What would be the fear in this case? Having someone in my home? I can't do anything about it. He invited her to stay without speaking to me about it, he said he had no choice because no one else had room for her and she couldn't stay with her father because they are having problems. Her mother is not living but she did not raise her, her father did. Its a long story. At any rate I feel for her and her situation but i am not in the position to be comforting or nurturing to her and to take her under my wing and help her out right now because i am not well myself. My psychiatrist even said it, he told me you are not able to be there for her or anyone else for that matter this is not good for you to be in this situation. But no one seems to get that. My bf doesn't. Even when i try to vent to people i get told that i should think about what she is going through and i should reach out to her try to understand her. Also, they say that my bf is being a good uncle and i should be more supportive of him too. They don't get that i don't have it in me to be her mentor. I don't have it in me to be able to give her the attention that she needs. I feel like i've been forced into this situation and it is making me feel bad and look bad as a person and its not good for her either. I'm angry about it and i feel like i shouldn't be, like i can't get angry because that would make me a bad person. I have no one to talk to or turn to either. I get to talk to my therapist once a week and it is not enough. I feel like i'm losing my mind. I am used to being by myself when my bf is not home. I cherish, crave my alone time, my space, my privacy. I can't take having someone around me, talking to me, questioning me, wanting my time and attention when i'm trying to have my peace. It is making me very anxious and i don't even have an appetitie these days. I feel like i have butterflys in my stomach all the time and a lump in my throat. Anyway i know i ranted a long time i just needed to be able to vent and tell my story and i hope that i get support and not advice about leaving my bf or trying to be more supportive to his neice because that is not going to help me in this situation. I am not in a good place right now i need to focus on myself i don't have what it takes to be able to be helpful to someone else right now. Is there anyone that can understand that and understand me???