Dazed and Miki - thanks for the wise words from the forum's Greats!
I was actually talking to my mum yesterday about my panic attacks. She's from the old-school style of 'get on with life'. She lived with parents who had to survive the war, so I suppose it's in her blood.
However she did suffer panic attacks when my father died. And depression. She still gets anxious in certain situations, and amazingly - and I didn't know this until last night- her way of dealing with them is exactly how this programme suggests. She questions her anxiety, does breathing exercises and calms herself. It's amazing that she figured that out without any intervention. She has never been to see a specialist about her anxiety.
She suggested that I go over for a holiday during my birthday, in June. I don't know if that's too much of a goal to set.
I am feeling massively better, but I'm still not anxiety free.
There are so many ironic sides to anxiety that you have to laugh about them (or you'll cry!)
You have to have enormous courage; but you are in constant fear.
You have to expose yourself to normal day situations; but you most likely suffer agrophobia.
You have to think positively; but your racing thoughts during anxiety are always negative.
When I suffere from depression, I described it to my psychologist as 'an unknown force had hijacked my mind'. I felt that in my depression, I had no control over what my mind thought.
And anxiety is very similar. It's difficult to bring those thoughts of 'doom and gloom' under control. I've found that the questions really do help though.
Miki, I suffer from fatigue on a daily basis. I've now gotten use to the fact that at certain times every day - I know I will feel enormous fatigue. It used to be all day - now it's just parts of the day.
I think adrenalin has a big part to play in that, too. If you are so anxious that all that adrenalin is pumping through your body - there's only one thing that can happen - it goes down. And when it leaves, you have nothing to power yourself on.
As for careers. Who knows? Maybe I will be in the force one day. Maybe Miki will be a fashion designer.
Miki - have you considered retail psychology? That's something that's always really appealled to me. Setting up shops to influence people.
And Dazed, it's fantastic to hear that you want to work in nursing administration. Your positive nature would be perfectly suited in that sort of role where people need encouragement, determination and stregnth.