I like that, Doc: "If you resist, it persists". And I believe acceptance is deliverance. It's kinda like an old game I used to play with friends, where you say something to them that you KNOW they don't want to think, for instance, lets say "pink elephant". But in hearing it, you automatically think of a pink elephant! The more you fight it, the more you think of it. The less worth you give it, the quicker it fades. Accept that it happens, accept you will think it, the more accepting you are of it, the quicker it passes through your mind. Soon, the pink elephant flashes quicker then the flicker of a bic lighter...leaving you to do whatever you want to next!
Thanks Breanne! I think my attitude came from this wonderful place you've brought to us, along with all the interesting, caring people here. Though I don't think I'll succeed, honestly, I think we all will.
Well, I am glad you got a laugh, you have offered me so many when I needed it. As for acceptance. I think that accepting this into your life is half the battle. I once read that acceptance is deliverance. I read in a very good book from Eckhart Tolle tha't "If you resist, it persists" and I really belive that. So way to go!
Rofl, Dee! I love that rush though!!!! I haven't gone on a ride since my PA hit, mostly because of the whole agoraphobia that came with it...but I can imagine myself sticking to the teacups too...thanks Dee and Doc for the laugh!
I guess the main point I've come to realize, is that things aren't as bad as they seem. I still have anxiety, I still have PA's, but I'm willing to let them happen...then let go and move on. 2 days ago, I would NOT have agreed with this. I would NOT have agreed to have a PA in front of anyone, especially someone I rarely speak to! For some odd reason, I felt it coming, and was accepting of it. Now will it be the same way in the future? Who knows? But going through this once and letting myself feel, accept, and overcome it, makes tomorrow a bit more hopeful. And I'm willing to accept all the hope I can. Well, the substantiated hope anywho.
Great stuff to hear Gene! The change in focus really does put things in perspective...it's like all this time, we've been wearing the wrong eyeglass prescription...
Whenever your ready to do it Miki, you know I will support you fully! I've seen you do some amazing things, and your a person who I think deserves them more then myself.
And Sarah, it felt great not to dwell. My mood overall was so much better then when I let the situation get to me. Past experiences I would dwell, calling myself names, imagining how it could have been better, building up tension and that tension would stick around for awhile. I didn't think this was possible before yesterday, but it seems like experiencing the PA and letting it happen kind of put things into light. Go figure, that which I avoid was the answer to that which I questioned. The answer always hides behind the fear, doesn't it?
Well well well you two guys thats great to read . Um yes Miki i get what you mean , would like to test the theory out but dont want a big PA lol .
Joe , about the rollercoaster thing . Idont get this at all . When i was younger i was a ride freak , went on anything . Was scared um out of my wits but had to try it , oh the rush . I cant even watch them now , strange . A few years ago i went on a ride , its was called Big Ben , kind of like disneys tower of terror . My sister sat next to me and we were off . OMG it was awful truly awful . I have never screamed so much out of pure terror in all my life , not even labour lol . Now a rollercoaster you know where you are , up down and around sort of thing . This flipping ride nope ! You shoot up god knows how many feet at brake neck speed then down half way and stop . Then you dont know if it will go up or down , talk about gut wrenching . I was TERRIFYED and so loud . So loud the guys made the ride last twice as long . Talk about bring the crowds in with this mentle woman screaming her head off , my kids were crying watching me .
So its the tea-cup rides in future haaaaaaaaa . Oh what am i like said in other thread that i was going , ok i am now .
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