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How does one deal with the unavoidable?


15 years ago 0 2101 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hello MInnessota,
 
I just wanted to say thank you for your lovely reply. It really makes me feel less alone to see so many of you understanding how I feel. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with me, it really means a lot ot me. It does help a lot. And I feel my cat listens too hehe. Thank you again for your reply and your support.
 
 
15 years ago 0 341 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
HI Diva, We lost our cat monty about a year ago, he was fine and then one day he stopped eating.  He was a year old.  So we finally took him to the vet and they found cancer in his lungs.  IT was awful, we had to put him to sleep.  It was very hard on us, we were both in tears.   The vets were wonderful, they were so comforting and kind to us.  This is not the first time I had a cat be put to sleep, my beloved Cleo, I had to put down. Our animals are very close to us, they love us unconditionally, and I think by just being with your cat and loving it is the main thing.
I hope that these words help you a little. I always talk to my cat (our new cat after monty, her name is Pepper), I feel she listens, even tho she is probably just staring at me. She follows me around all day,
and sits on my lap and purrs...
MN
15 years ago 0 2101 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hello Breanne,
 
Thank you so much for all your support today. It helped me a lot.
 
Hiya CD,
 
Thank you so much for your beautiful reply. Thank you for understanding how this is so important to me. I am sorry to hear about your nan. And also about your cat, even if he was a wild one. Wow your nan dying and a miscarriage! Sounds like a really horribly tough time.
 
Thank you also for your advice and for inviting me to comeon here and chat with you guys. It is good to know someone is here to help me through this. Thank you also for your kind words.
 
Your caring really helps me a lot!
 
ATM I am doing ok. I have ok moments and then I have moments where I am so sad and anxious and scared that I can barely breathe. My heart aches and it feels like I have pressure in my head. But I use the tools I have amassed and I am getting through this. I try to take it one hour at a time. My husband is being really nice about it. He gets how I feel about my kitty. He said we will bring the cat to the vet. He said we would take good care of him, whatever that means. He also went to rent me two new movies to help me through my evening. I know avoiding things is not the best things but atm I need the distraction. Good of him to tke time out of his evening to rent me movies.
 
Thank you again for helping me through this. I am not good at dealing with this kind of thing.
 
 
15 years ago 0 778 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Oh Diva i  feel comepletely helpless here hun but im with you in spirit . My heart is going out to you . I lost one of my cats earlier this year but he was a wild one and only came in for food . I would be exatly the same as you if my other boy cat was as poorly as yours cos he's so lovely . But he's only one , my dog is getting very old and slow and i do worry about her and she,s only deaf .
I lost my nan in december after a very long illness and was dreading 'that' day espically as it happened only a week after my miscarriage . But i handled it , no idea how i did . I cried and was sad but kept myself busy . Maybe too busy so i would advice you to take things easy and talk to us when ever .
You do derserve things ok , you are a lovely caring person .
 
Your in thoughts please take care CD xxxx
15 years ago 0 1693 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Diva,
 
Of course you deserve it! Please take the time today to do something special for yourself.
 
Breanne, Bilingual Health Educator
15 years ago 0 2101 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I have not managed to work at all up to now today. and yet I am so far behind on work it is ridiculous!
 
Truth is this bothers me and has been bothering me so much more then I care to admit. I guess that is why I am having nightmares about this. I do not want to "therapeutically harass" my poor cat. At the same time I don't want to just give up on him before it is time and have him put down. Now, not knowing what to do is making me super anxious. I called the vet and they suggest bringing him in for a checkup. I will bring him as soon as I can. Will ask my hubby if he can drive me and the cat there soon (as in this week). I am afraid they will tell me it is time to put him down. I am not sure I am ready for that at all.
 
Some people say "it" when talking of their cat. To them a cat is just a cat. I say he and he is more then just a silly cat to me. He has been my constant companion and one of my best friends for 13-14 years now. I love that cat like he is a member of my family. Call it an unhealthy attachement if you want but there it is. So for me the idea of him passing on is depressing and very scary. I do not know how I will deal with this. I feel close to panicking. Boy am I ever glad I have thte tools I leanred here to deal with days like today! Been close to panic al day but no panic as of now and I know I can deal with it if it comes. Thank God for this website! Sorry if I ramble I think I am "nerve typing" atm!
 
I feel so beside myself. And on top of it I keep feeling guilty I am not working! I am so far behind! I shoudl go do something to make me feel better but I feel like I don't deserve it because I haven't worked. Sigh...
 
What will I do for my cat. I love him, I want him to pass at home. Vet says that rarely happens and I think they are trying to get me ready. But I am not. I wish you could see my cat. Even old and sick and skinny he is a beautiful cat.
15 years ago 0 1693 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Diva,
 
Again, I am so sorry to hear about your cat. What a horrible thing to have to deal with.
Members, has anyone had to deal with a huge loss? What did you do to help ease the anxiety and pain?
 
Breanne, Bilingual Health Educator
15 years ago 0 2101 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi guys, having a funky morning lol! I was wondering how one deals with the unavoidable hehe. I had a bad dream last night and it really left me in a slump. It involved the passing away of one of my cats. Now, I know this is just a dream. The reason this dreams is so hard on my is because my cat is very ill. He has diabetes and it is very hard to control lately. He feels nauseous all the time because of it. As such he does not drink and feed himself well enough because he is not hungry. That is the theory anyway. Now this is not a good sign. Cats instinctively drink and eat usually. The vet says it could fix itself but at this point I beleive that it won't. It has been months...Bizarrely he seems very comfortable. He still climbs on things and he comes to see us to get petted and he purs for hours. He is just the best cat ever! He is so nice! Just a great personnality. Now sometimes he seems hungry. Then he hounds me and follows me and miaows at me. But when I give him food he does not eat. So I end up having to give him water under his skin so he stays hydrated and I have to feed him with a psoon when he won't eat on his own. the worse part is he doesn't seem to mind the spoon. He just sits there and lets me feed him. He doesn't even try to run away and I don't hold him down or anything! He just won't eat on his own most days. I am scared. I know it means he is getting ready to go. I feed him and give him his water lovingly everyday theese days. I hug him and let him know I love him. I want him to be comfortable so he can stay at home with us till he passes. I want him to be with his family surrounded when he goes. So I decided as long as he is not suffering I will care for him. I am scared though. Scared to be the one to find him after he passes. I am scared because I love him and I do not know how I will deal with his passing. I am so anxious atm. I do not deal well with things like these. And I know some of you might think this is silly for he is just a cat but as you can see I am very attached to this cat. Anyway, Sorry to go on about this, I am just scared atm and trying to wrap my head around this. Thank you for listening.
 
 

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