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Obsessively Afraid


16 years ago 0 778 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I can relate to you on that minnesota , quite alot actually .
16 years ago 0 341 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
HI, I think we have to believe there is something more out there. Its hard for me to say this, but i've watched shows on tv and read stuff. Some people that have had near death or death experiences and have been revived, said they felt peaceful and saw a light. Its hard to not be afraid, i'm very afraid, but I feel more calm if I believe that there has to be more. Still saying that i have my scared days. But I am trying to just not think about it.
16 years ago 0 313 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Miki... It sounds like you're having a rough go right now. I completely understand and have been there. Diva has shared some great ideas! Although I don't have an easy solution I do have a few thoughts to share also. I want to stress again that sometimes this disorder runs hand in hand with OCD and obsessive thinking that is not easily turned off. Therefor what you are feeling is NORMAL and OK.. and a lot of us have shared that experience. The anxiety caused by these intrusive thoughts at times can be overwhelming and scary. I would definately work on challenging your thoughts more than anything and if it's not working you may need help greater than this program to get you started.. someone who can show you how to specifically deal with these "obsessions" because THEY ARE TREATABLE... and you can definately learn some coping techniques.. to "quiet the voice" I say... I too have shared with my hubby but because he has NEVER experienced what I have his views are very simplistic.. like yours.. "focus on the happy stuff".. much easier said than done when your in the moment. If only it were that easy. lol... I often laugh that I married such a laid back no stress type of guy.. I am SOOO opposite.. lol. As for not having a "belief"... that's a personal journey you can embark upon. It doesn't mean you have to go to church.. You can begin with the spiritual side of things.. That includes anything from reading, meditation, yoga, even taking the Alpha courses to see if religion is your cup of tea. I read uplifting stories about peoples experiences that show a glimpse at the "other side".. There is a lot of reassurance in reading these, and they often inspire me in one way or another.. For me the obsessive thinking is the worst but I honestly couldn't quiet the "voice" without medication and I had done everything to work through it on my own.. I just found it took me a long time to actually be honest with my doctor about my "thoughts".. I had shared the anxiety but it took me years to admit to the thoughts... even now I find them hard to talk about... but I do.. because it's the best way to fight them.. Well, I hope this helps.. I've rambled on and on as always... Be kind to yourself.
16 years ago 0 2101 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hello Miki, I wish I had better advice for you or a magic wand to help you with this...I have to admit that the way I got over this is closely connected to what your husband said. I read this great books that talk about the Power of Now. They explain why to stay in the present and how to do so. It really helped me. When I start freaking out about the future I ask myself:"In this present moment, am I really in danger, do I REALLY have a problem?" Then if the answer is no, wellI ask myself:" Then what do I want to do Now?" IF the answer is yes, I ask myself what can I do about it NOW? Sometimes the only answer is I can accept that I have this problem now. But accepting it reaLLY DOES HELP. Anyway, so my way of getting over this was to just accept that it isout there, that I wonder about it. Mostly I just started living in the present moment and found that in the present is where I have control, power and the possibility ofr action. The present is where I live and where I can be happy. That is good enough for me. Sorry I cannot give you better advice except look up books that talk of the Power of Now. They helped me learn to be more present in the Now and that has helped me a lot. I wish I had better for you... Take care Mikki, and let us know how you are doing. -Diva
16 years ago 0 477 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey guys, I'm back again to this fear. I don't know how to deal with it. I started to research about death and fear of death but I can't seem to find any closure to this fear. It is also a irrational fear that there seems to be no way of over coming it. I just end up crying to my mom again and I hate that because I am not considering her feelings about it too. In a change, I've discussed it with my husband yesterday and he said I have to focus on now and being happy now. I told him I try to do it and I know what makes me happy but instantly a voice in my head will say, "but this happiness will all disappear when we die." I feel like I'm definite of what death will "feel" like.. an unimaginable thing and that is what drives me insane. Once in a while I can convince myself, that maybe it's not that bad.. but instantly again, I will ask myself how could it not be bad? I know right now I have so much time on myself that I am obsessively thinking of this and I feel stuck. How do people with no belief deal with this, like myself?
16 years ago 0 778 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Your welcome Miki , really appricate you sharing with us as well . You are helping us as much as us you you know ! You have a good postive plan well done :)
16 years ago 0 477 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey guys, thanks so much for the support. I had a good talk with my mom about it and she has made me feel better. I've decided that I will focus on my now.. I mean, I've realized that that is the important thing to do now. The thought comes back once in a while but I've made up hopes what I wish what death may be like since there is no way of really finding out. Since this is the only definite chance I'll get I decided to appreciate all of the smallest things and love the things I love. I also bought a book about how to over come the death anxiety and I will let you all know how it is. I will check out that Oprah thing too. I really do appreciate this site and DazedMommy, minnesota, Danielle, and cornish-dee thanks for your input. It makes me feel better.
16 years ago 0 778 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hello Miki , you are not alone on this one . DazedMommy has come up trumps again with the advice . Ive recenty started going to church after a very very long time and am finding it so reassuring (um havnt been last few weeks as ive been so bad but cant wait to feel better to go again. Thats one of my aims . Just wanted you to know your not alone .
16 years ago 0 8760 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Miki, The fear you have is quite common among those with panic disorder. We strongly encourage you to keep working through the program. It will teach you how to identify & challenge the negative & anxious thoughts you are having. Danielle, Bilingual Health Educator
16 years ago 0 341 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Miki, I have had the same thoughts about death, I have been terrified and the exact same as you. I almost threw up for conjuring up all these thoughts from fear. Now that I joined this website, I feel a lot better about things. Its great to be able to have this support group, I didnt know there were others like me, and it comforts me to see i'm not alone. Also I watched, and listened on Oprah about this book called "the new earth". Oprah discusses it with the author. At first I rolled my eyes when someone told me to listen to it. You can listen to it on your computer, they have the chapters. Its very interesting. The first chapter is a bit confusing, but I found chapter 5 the most interesting for anxiety sufferers. Let me know what you think?

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