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11 years and counting

Timbo637

2024-10-31 6:49 AM

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Feels like hell week all over!!

Timbo637

2024-10-30 9:38 AM

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Roller Coaster Withdrawal

Timbo637

2024-10-14 12:28 PM

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Smile....and don't shoot the messenger

Timbo637

2024-09-27 3:17 PM

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Browse through 411.768 posts in 47.066 threads.

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How can anyone live like this??


21 years ago 0 30 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Sarah just last night I asked my boyfriend why couldn't I have been born with no legs instead of this disorder. It may sound extreme but that's how I feel. My poor boyfriend and kids. I just don't look like me anymore and I can't do the things I used to. I hate this. :mad:
21 years ago 0 57 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Mom and Sarah, I thought it was only me!!! I don't take showers every day, I don't shave my legs very often. Yes my heart races in the shower, I wonder why? I never feel good, I never look good, I just don't care anymore. My poor husband. I too wish I had something else, I don't care what, just something other than this. I just watched 8 simple rules (john ritter show), now I feel worse. That has to have been the saddest show I have ever seen. If anyone finds the miracle cure, tell me, I will do or pay anything.
21 years ago 0 128 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi mom2jasper, You pretty much said just what I am feeling. I can't sleep anymore because I'm so convinced that I'm dying so I'm exhausted and drained all the time. Even if I could go out I wouldn't want to because I feel like s$#t all the time. I haven't washed my hair in a week and I only shower every couple days cause my heart always races in the shower. Doesn't really matter anyways because I don't go anywhere. Despite all this I still have hope. This disease has stolen so much from me already and I refuse to let it take my hope too. Once you lose that I believe you've really lost everything. This is a nightmare and I am so happy that I have other people (in this support group) that can totally relate. Some of my friends and family are great but if you haven't experienced it there is no way you could know what it feels like. I was thinking this morning that I would rather be a parapalegic than have panic disorder/agoraphobia. At least I could enjoy life a bit and not be in constant fear. There are few illnesses worse than this one I believe. One thing that has helped me is to remember that it is an illness and nobody asked to feel like this and be this way. We would never choose to be like this. I think guilt for having "done this to myself" was one of my biggest obstacles to overcome in all this. Reading all these postings where everyone has exactly the same symptoms as I do means that it MUST be a medical, biologically based illness. Hang in there, you're not alone. Sarah :) :)
21 years ago 0 30 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
UGH. That pretty much sums up how I feel. For a couple of days I felt like I was making some progress, but today bam! back in the old panic cycle. Surprisingly I did not have any panic attacks, but I beat myself up because I have this disorder. (Which isn't the first time - I've had panic disorder/depression for 9 years) I feel like I am never going to get any better. I no longer feel human. (If that makes sense!) My house is a mess, I don't care what I look like, I can't cook, and I have panic attacks in the shower. (This coming from someone who used to shower twice a day! :gasp: ) I can no longer see any good in myself, only this stupid disorder. I'm so angry at myself and my panic attacks. I know that thinking this way isn't doing me one bit of good but I can't seem to break out of this "funk". Does anyone else ever feel like this? I feel so alone...

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