EvolutionHealth.care

Home
Main Forum
Managing Drinking
Introduce Yourself
Will I ever get this right?

Advanced Search Form

Will I ever get this right?

6 years ago 0 +0 / -0 19

Good morning Eve & Herval, I'm new here and am reading as much as I can

To help support my goal of not drinking. Today is day 10 for me. I have also quit before

For months at a time. Always ending in believing I was now in control

And choosing to just have a few. Need I say more? I'm hoping I've learned

From my failures, but I still have a nagging fear, the time will come again

And I'll ignore the voice that tells me it's not a good idea and embrace the voice that tells me

I deserve to have a little fun and relax for a bit. I have committed to not rink until

Thanksgiving. I'm pretty confident I can do that. After that, is where I will

Have to unload my arsenal of everything I have learned.

Stay strong my friends, we're not alone on this island. Strength in numbers, right!

Have a clean, clear, productive day!??????

6 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2

Go you!

Thanks for the welcome :-) and I hope the book helps.

Hold on to that sentence about old chapters. You are right, alcohol is no longer apart of our story.

As for putting aside some relationships, I guess its just matter of time when we realise sometimes the only thing that we have in common with some of our mates is to gather around a liquid.

All the best with it, Im sure we may cross paths in chats down the track.. Im sure I will need to reach out from time to time.

6 years ago 0 +0 / -0 8

Hi Eve007,

Welcome to AHC! Thank you for referring the book to me, I'll check it out. I have done a lot of reading and learned lots in doing so but I'm always interested in learning more. The thing is, because I have always been able to abstain for weeks/months even years at a time, I guess I thought I essentially had things under control. However, more recently I've decided the whole drinking thing has become tiresome and certainly not fun. (When I drink, I drink to get drunk) I've developed a different mindset this time. It's not a case of getting through the weekend, or avoiding triggers so much, it's more like I feel that chapter of my life is now over. I really do not want to hang out with the people that I used to drink with. There is no white knuckling or mourning. It's more like leaving a job you were ambivalent about and finally finding the fit that you've been looking for. You're spot on Eve007, I've found that window of opportunity and I'm never going to let it close on me again.

6 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2

Hi HG,

I'm new to this site and thought to say hi. Well done for returning and for being so honest and open.

I too have had a couple of goes, and have made a bad judgment thinking I can just have a couple and I'll be back on track tomorrow.... but that method didn't work for me.

I have been digging around to learn a few things as to why it is so challenging, and to work at not being so hard on ourselves for when it doesn't turn out as we'd hoped. Just got to find the next window of opportunity which it sounds as though you have right now.

I think over the years we really have grooved in the habits we have subconsciously, time and time again. It's then no wonder we desire to turn to wine or whatever it may be as we have learnt it is easy to do and we can escape what ever it is or overly enjoy a situation with friends or celebrations. It appears that part of the battle is we come so far from what it feels like in the raw. So it's going to time and it gets undeniably uncomfortable.

I wonder if digging into some good books that are around behaviors and belief systems might help? Just so that you can read a bit each day, so you keep topped up with the truths that we are so clever at deceiving our perceptions with.

Have you read This Naked Mind?

6 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1562

"""All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals usually brief were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization."""

We need to have a deep realization that we doomed without taking initiative.

6 years ago 0 +0 / -0 8

Hi Foxman and Julie,

Thanks so much for the welcome back! Foxman, you are so right...I convinced myself that I could keep my drinking to just one bottle of wine per week LOL! I actually did for awhile but then recently a friend came over...another bottle...party...yet another bottle plus beer and spirits and that's when it really got crazy in that I totally blew the week so I got yet another bottle smh.

Julie, I've been watching youtube alcohol help video's like Alcohol Mastery TV and Stop Drinking Expert among others. The "Expert" put an interesting spin on when AV starts up. He said, instead of thinking how much you would like a glass of wine (ten), insert something like "potato." How crazy is it to think, OMG, if I could just have a potato! That truly is the insanity. The long weekend is coming so I'll be planning lots of AF activities. I've also decided to stay away from my drinking friends...a huge trigger. Lucky for me, I have family close by none of which drink. Anyway, so far so good. I'm 100% committed...I'm doing this!

6 years ago 0 +0 / -0 286

herval gal,

Welcome back. Good for you for getting back on here, that takes courage and thanks for your honesty which helps us all. It seems that getting the right mix of supports and tools that work is so important and it seems so different for everyone. What can you change or add to do things differently this time?

So good to hear from you again!

6 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1562

Welcome back HG. Right knowledge is key. Its the peculiar mental twist that goes through between our ears prior to picking up. Sometimes we don't even think. Thats the subtle insanity that precedes every relapse. It could be a day after we take a solemn oath never to do this again. But we get blind sighted. What happens after that is just drama. We get caught in that vicious cycle, which again could last few days, weeks, months even years.

6 years ago 0 +0 / -0 8

Hello everyone,

For those of you who may be wondering, "herval" translates to "relapse." I've actually been on this forum for years but couldn't bring myself to come back as I was originally known. In fact, I'm hiding from everyone as my perpetual failures have me very depressed. How is it that I could be manipulated so easily by the promise of a few hours of well being? For me, it just leads to blackouts and really hating myself. I know there is a much better life to be lived than getting totally stupid drunk. On the positive side, I'm not experiencing withdrawal since I kept my indiscretions to mainly weekends but as is always the case for me, it recently escalated and I knew I had to stop. So, I'm back, but this time I'm staying........sober!

Reading this thread:

today's top discussions:

This Month’s Leaders:

Most Supportive

Most Active

Most Loved

Will I ever get this right?