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7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 421

HI Flipflopmom how's it going? I think you did a great job at not getting sucked down the bottle. I hope you do something nic for yourself to celebrate your successful not drinking!

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 286

How are things today Flipflopmom?

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 345

Hi Flipflopmom,

Sorry to read that you're feeling badly. I've noticed from some of your previous posts that you've had a bit of a go with things since you decided to abstain. Not sure if you considered taking some supplements to help your mood however, often times, people who've had an issue with alcohol will also be low in complex B vitamins. Two other elements are magnesium and iodine. You can get these from foods but not necessarily enough. Worth a google in any event.

You mentioned wanting to numb yourself for a bit but as you know, that's such a temporary fix with annoying side effects. I read an article recently that rather than bury or numb your hurts, it's better to embrace them as a real part of your life and deal with it. Whether it's something you can do anything about or not. I believe the Serenity Prayer echos this sentiment. It essentially comes down to accepting life on life's terms.

Stop the aggravation, stop the cycle.

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 286

Well done on the not- drinking yesterday, even though you wanted to numb. Life is hard sometimes and if our past strategy was to numb the tough feelings away, that seems to be our go-to thought for a while. The thing is, as we find out, that numbing takes away all the good feelings too, and drinking doesn't really make anything better.

I find journalling and meditation helpful when going through a tough patch. It sounds like you have some ideas already for caring for yourself. That is wonderful!

Sending a big hug your way, Flipflopmom. Hang in there.

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 113

Last night I really wanted to drink... But I didn't.

I was feeling sick of being sober. I had a bad day and I wanted to just forget it. I wanted to get numb for a little while and dull my sadness.

Life is hard sometimes, and I feel the urge to fall back into my old ways. I told my friend through tears yesterday that I need to "right the ship."

Today I'm planning on writing down my goals for this school year. I homeschool my daughter, but I always keep a list of personal goals in view so that I take care of myself. Maybe I'll re-read the Ekhart Tolle chapters on accepting what is...

Feeling a bit down.....

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 113

Hi Duffy,

I can honestly say that I was not tempted to drink when I was going through those problems. No one else was drinking around me, though, so that helps. I was tempted to bottle up my emotions, which used to make me want to drink, so I think that allowing myself to feel my negative emotions stopped the cycle. I don't do well with stress, and emotional stress is particularly hard for me. Experiencing my feelings is harder for me than abstaining from alcohol. It's been an interesting thing to learn about myself.

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 22

Sounds like you're doing great as far as staying away from the bottle, congrats! You mentioned that alcohol isn't even an option anymore, which is great! Even during the recent stressors in your life did you have any moments of temptation?

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 113

The last few weeks have been very difficult for me. I've had big challenges in my family, some really hard confrontations, a bit of depression, and I hurt my back. Thankfully, I have still managed to stay sober. Yay, me!

I think it really helps that my husband hardly drinks at all now, so it's not part of our social life anymore. It's strange, it's like alcohol just isn't in my life anymore....

It's hard dealing with my feelings when I'm upset or angry. This is new to me. I used to internalize my negative emotions and then get so frustrated I wanted to drink. Now I just feel like I'm a mess for a little while, crying and being all mad, then eventually things ease up and I feel ok. It's certainly easier to bottle up, that's the old me... but that's not an option anymore.

Also, the confrontations are hard. Some of my estranged family has moved back to town, and our differences are hard for me to handle. This family has teenage daughters and they were very disrespectful to me in my home, so I told them that I need them to abide by our rules when they are here. It didn't go well.... Now they said they never want to come to my house again and I have to deal with that outcome..... I guess it's better to honor my truth than to self harm, right?

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 115

Flipflipmom,

I have had these dreams a few times in the last year. I dont know why the occured. I guess its maybe a way of reminding us of how bad it is when we let alcohol take over.

All I know is that when I wake up, Im so relived that the nightmare isnt real. It reminds me of why I never ever want to expierence "the day after" effects ever again.

7 years ago 0 +0 / -0 345

Hi Flipflopmom,

I too had dreams where I was drunk and woke up very upset thinking for a moment that I had actually drank. You may want to examine what's going on in your life. Are you worried at all about what other people think of you, are you worried that you will lose control or do you lack self confidence and perhaps are judging yourself too harshly? Such feeling may come out in dreams and your dreams are simply trying to tell you to ease up on yourself, be kind to and love yourself. Should your inner voice become negative and start judging you, turn it around and make it positive. Remind yourself frequently of how proud you are of yourself and don't forget to reward yourself just for being you.

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