Hello. I am not new to this site but it has been
awhile since my last post. Other than a
few days last summer, I have been an everyday drinker for the past 10+
years. This drinking included 6 drinks
of beer, wine, liquor or a combination a day. I thought I had things in control because I
could always stop at 6 (maybe 7 on the weekend) and on occasion could stop at
4. Any attempt to go below 4 drinks did
not end in success. A while back I
decided I was simply tired of the whole act of drinking; waiting for the “time”
to begin drinking, wondering if the place I was going would have alcohol, how I
would get in my drinks if I was with non-drinkers, what time I needed to stop
in order to be able to work the next day. The whole cycle was/is exhausting.
Today marks
Day 21 of being alcohol free. I finally
decided that I was tired of the game; I wasn’t winning, would never win so why
continue to play. The reason for this
post is to say a little about my struggles being without alcohol. I have am a daily reader of the post and so
many of the posters have stated feeling very good and able to sleep better than
ever. This is not the case for me. The first week I felt like I had taken sleep
medication when I woke up (I had taken nothing). The entire day seemed a blur. I was lucky enough not to suffer shakes, etc.
but just did not seem right. Sleeping
was no better. It took a long time to
fall asleep and when I did was up every hour or so. As I progressed into the second week I began
to feel better during the day but the sleeping did not improve. Fortunately I was able to go to sleep only to
wake and stay awake for 2-3 hours. Last
week, week 3, finally showed improvement but still not where I should be, and
that is OK. I have a biology background and I know the true recovery will take
a bit longer. The body has to learn to “live”
again, not just recover from the previous night. My body and brain have to learn to sleep, not
just concede to the alcohol.
I hope this
post helps someone, if you are having problems you are not alone. Everyday does get better and regardless of
the problems it is still better than a hangover. I read somewhere that waking up without
alcohol is better than coming to. True
statement, it has got me through many nights when I wanted a drink.
Good luck to
everyone!