I was AF for over a yr after several yrs of drinking. And felt great. But, we had 2 deaths very close to us and So I used it as an excuse and started again this past Holiday season. It just got worse and worse through the months until a bad weekend 7/25. I've been AF since then--except for a sample of beer one day at work (part of my job) and one night at a huge event with my husband (last Saturday night) but was under his watchful eye and over like a 6 hr period not very much and didn't even finish---so technically I am not completely AF but I feel like I am.
I don't want to ever go back to the self loathing, slow death that was what I had turned my life into. It really does feel like such an accomplishment. I feel so good every day and not like the fraud I felt like I was being. I still struggle with moderation Vs totally abstaining but I believe that living AF is the best choice for me--we don't keep it at home and I stay out of 'that' isle at the grocery store and your right it's a second chance at life.
ND-awesome job!! May I ask how long now? I had some insane ideology and excuses about my drinking. I tried to convince myself it was all true. I hated the thought of drinking daily. Yet I felt like I couldn't abstain. Being AF is such an accomplishment isn't it? I too never want to go back to that dark and grim place. Keep up the great work.
Wow your story really hit home with me. Like a mirror. What an inspiration. I read it several times. Thank you for posting it.
When I see the courage of everyone on here and see such similar stories to my life I realize I am at the right place--this site. I too had anxiety if I thought I would run out of alcohol and at one time convinced myself I had to ' take my medicine' every day to be able to get along with everyone. How messed up is that??!!
Anyway--- I am feeling so proud that I am AF and feeling so much better about life and happy...really happy for the first time in a long time because I'm not hiding, not hung over most of the day after a jag and my family is proud of me. I can't go back to where I went/was or I won't make it out this time. It's scary to remember it but, if I don't i might repeat it and that is unacceptable...
Great on the rest of your goals and achievements! I look forward to reading for from you.
Thanks Ashley-I learned that I am capable of achieving a goal. Also, I can overcome something that was so debilitating to me, alcohol. And I am learning to look forward to things in life. My mind is more clear. And lastly, I learned I like myself better this way.
Hi Dave-thanks so much! When I made the decision to stop, I made my mind up that 'this was it'. Yet I was so fearful because alcohol was my go to every day for years. I was so depressed, had NO motivation or goals, and just waited til evening to start drinking. And I was spiraling and drinking more. It would take me half the day to get over the hungover feeling. Dave, I just had enough. I took it a day at a time, and continue to do so. Also, prayed a lot, especially during the tough times. Each day I was AF, I became more proud of myself and confident I could do this. I was actually accomplishing and working toward a goal. This was something I had not done in years. Now, I'm focused on loosing the rest of this weight, remaining AF and getting healthy. Recently, my doctor mentioned drinking wine in moderation is ok, but should only be a glass. I immediately told her I cant do that nor do I want to! I told her I wouldn't be able to stop at one glass. I now recognize I will never be able to drink again, and I'm fine with that. Just so blessed to have this 2nd chance at life. Thanks for the inspiration. Blessings!
Congratulations on an epic milestone! So happy to hear that your motivation is continuing to grow and life is getting so much better. Well Done! I was wondering where you got to.....really great to hear from you so "Thank you!" for checking in. I'm doing well myself. Traveling a bit at the moment and enjoying life. Still AF. What do see as being the keys to your success?
Greetings! It's been a while since I've been on. I just wanted to share a few things. I'm over 90 days AF. This is something I never thought I could accomplish. I can recall having anxiety at the thought of not having enough alcohol in the house. And major anxiety if I may skip a day without drinking. I had got to a very grim and low point in my life. I accepted my daily routine and just settled every day. For those who are just starting this journey, please know there is hope. You can do this! When I started this journey, I was a hot mess the first few weeks, to include anxiety. But it did get a little better each day. I had such support on here. And I continuously read the message boards. I'm so glad I made this change. Each day I'm feeling better, more optimistic, and motivated in life. Plus, I've lost over 30 pounds!! That is still a work in progress......more to loose. So keep working toward your goals. Every day is a new day. Blessings to you all!!
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