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Deciding when moderation doesn?t work.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1009

Hi Camiol,

The diary is an excellent tool. Be sure to make notes about how you are honestly feeling, both good and bad. I just reviewed mine and even though I have a lot of 0's over the last couple of weeks the real gold for me are the notes when I didn't and was over-indulging. It's a clear reminder to me why I've made the decision to quit drinking because it's a record of how bad I felt the day after. I just arrived at the hotel out on the east coast for a wedding. I'm by myself and the first person I saw in the airport was my nephew who immediately said he was looking forward to having some beers and partying it up with me. I told him I'm not drinking and he seemed a little disappointed but hey, he's 24 and this is part of his lifestyle. I 'm glad I checked my dairy because it became very clear to me I've made the right decision but if I didn't document my feelings I think it would be easy to deliberately forget why I'm doing this and considered having a beer. Thank god I made those notes.

I have no doubt I'll come across challenges over the next few days but I won't drink any alcohol. It will take time to become comfortable telling friends, family, and co-workers I don't drink but every time I do it will strengthen my resolve.

regards,

Dave

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 616

Wow I just looked at my diary and the last time I posted how many drinks I had was June 2. I have made the decision to start recording today and I posted zeros. I think that by not keeping track of my drinking, I was hiding how often and how much I was drinking. If I don't see it, it's not real right? Today I'm going to begin keeping track again, I need the reality check.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 616

Have a safe trip back home....I'm going to do whatever it takes to not drink today.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 409

Thanks - funny how the 'night out' wasn't really a struggle. Last night at home with the family was a bit harder. We are leaving my mom's house today, and all of us are ready to leave. You know how family is best when kept to 3 days or less..... Yesterday was day 4 here, and my husband has spent the entire time going around the house and fixing things that are broken. He bought some beer last night to drink for himself. He didn't drink it in front of me, but even knowing that he had a beer to "relieve" the family stress (and I didn't) made me really crave it for a few minutes. My older sister, who isn't a drinker, but she is a heavy smoker, went with him, and my mom made a catty remark about my sister, which just made me sad. At any rate, another day sober for me.

I love the stop sign idea, and also the thought of someone (in a future-supportive kind of way) videotaping the drunk behavior as a reminder of why alcohol is so insidious. Camiol, don't kick yourself, just take it a day at a time. Maybe today's the day... Gotta go, and I'll talk to you all later.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 616

Turquoise I'm so happy for you that you were able to drink diet coke and have a great time while your friends had wine. I can imagine you felt very empowered when you got home. I keep thinking about your sobriety and try to imagine myself being sober everyday, so far I'm just not able to stop.

ElizabethRRRR I did drink three glasses of wine the other night. I didn't even like it. Last night I had a glass of wine, then went for dinner with a girlfriend, I had two beer. When I got home I had two more glasses of wine. Today I'm ticked at myself and want to stop. Right now I'm telling myself I will not drink anything at all tonight. I really want to get this awful addiction out of my life. With my daughter away at the cottage and my husband working the afternoon shift, I seem to have too much time on my hands and I pour a drink. I know that's no excuse, I could find things to keep me busy but I choose to drink instead. The other night I did keep busy but still was able to drink wine while I worked. Whenever I start a new job, I really want to have my life back, and be free of alcohol. I need to really start working on it and not let it defeat me.

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1009

Hi Elizabeth,

Very cool idea putting the stop sign on the wine bottle. I like it.

I was thinking about the past and drinking it up with friends and family. I wish I had the fore-sight to have someone video tape me when I was completely in the bag during one of those Saturday night parties. I have no doubt if I watched it later when I straightened up I would likely not want to drink again. :)

Keep up the good work!

Regards

Dave

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 161

Turquoise, 16 days! You have no idea how much your success is helping me too. All summer I have been trying to get back in shape and change the harmful routines I had fallen into. I am not yet as strong as you are, but I am stronger and I feel better. Thank you again for sharing your feelings and your struggles.

Dave, I printed out a red stop sign that says "Stop and Think" and I cut a slit through the middle and put it right around the neck of the wine bottle. Tuesday nights are often a problem for me. I stopped after two glasses (5 ounces each). It felt great to not want any more.

I have dropped about three pounds since this summer of getting my health back started. The hardest part has been getting my head straight.

Camiol, how did it go last night?

Hi Sian!

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1009

You rock Turquoise! Excellent work. Way to stick to your resolve. Totally impressed.

Dave

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 100

Turquoise I admire your grit for sticking to your goal and having a good time regardless. Whatever amount of diet coke it takes! How are your energy levels doing? Are you beginning to notice any positive pay-offs in terms of how you feel?

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 409

Well, I got through last night, and had a blast with my girlfriends, even though they were both drinking wine and I had (a lot of) diet coke. Thanks for all your support! 16 days sober and counting....

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