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I need support from others who understand :(

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I need support from others who understand :(

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1022

You know DreamR, it is so encouraging to hear how you are listening and absorbing all the suggestions ... and love. I feel so positive for you. When you talk about lecturing your daughter of the dangers... OMG! Been there, done that. My daughter is now 27 and a very moderate, only occasional drinker. So there is hope. We can change our family legacy for them. We really can! Hang in there sweetie :) Keep reading, posting and working through your toolbox. we are always here :)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12

Marylizzy

Thank you for your e-mail, it was my first posting and I really appreciate your response.

My Dad was a hard core alcholic and your right I grew up with and still suffer from a very tramatic childhood, I have often asked myself why after so much pain am I following the same path. I have managed to keep this disease very well hidden but my daughter is 19 now and she certainly sees that her mom can tip back a few. I have become so good at hiding it that many people would have no idea.

My childhood demons run deep and I guess they have carried over into my adult life as much as I don't want them to follow they always seem to.

Thanks again

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12

Athena

Your e-mail really touched my heart, thank you :) You must be proud of yourself !!! Please keep up the good work!!!

My daughter is 19 now and certainly has started to figure out that her mom is quite the "partier" I live in constant fear that I will pass this horrible disease to her and I am constantly talking to her about the dangers of drinking to much what a hypocrite I am. Her Dad also has issues with it and as you know I live in fear.

I have gone weeks without drinking and always feel better but then for some reason I think I don't have this disease anymore and become resentful of not being able to enjoy a few drinks like "normal" people and I seem to fall right back in again. I guess it is frustrating when there are times that I truly do enjoy it instead of using it for the "purposes of evil" as I call it.

I like your idea of not saying I will never drink again, I think setting realistic goals will help with a disease that I have battled since I was younger than my daughter is now.

Once again thank you for taking the time to write some kind words to a person who needed to hear them :)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12

Hi m

Thank you for e-mail it meant so much to me to know that you would take the time to write. It did take a bit for me to finally post something but I am so glad that I did. I can tell people on here know what I struggle with daily and for some reason not being alone in this makes me feel better.

I have never had the courage to do AA and when I found this forum I thought it would be a good place to start. Even hiding behind some type written words has been very emotional for me. I have close friends who support me but with all of the demons I have battled in my life sometimes I just feel broken.

Once again thank you, I appreciate your support :)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12

Hi Tiana

Thanks so much for your reply, I appreciate you taking the time to for me.

I have gone weeks even months without drinking and I for some reason I relaspe, I am currently seeing a wonderful psychologist to try to heal the wounds of my past. My father was a hard core alcholic and one he just stopped cold turkey no AA no explanation, he passed away now and left me with more baggage than I can carry, mom is a whole other story...lol.

I certainly will involve myself more in the program and I really liked all of your suggestions, I think it is unrealistic to quick cold turkey but I want to make some serious changes and eventually in time it might lead to quitting all together.

I am an educated person who works in the health profession and for years have beat myself up thinking I should know better, AA never seemed like the right option for me but I must admit the support I have received from this site have made me feel less alone.

Once again thank you for taking the time to be there :)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 653

Hi again, Dream Reality,

As you can see by the posts, drinking is different for different people, so I think only you can answer your question: "can I manage my drinking?". What if you dealt with the things that are making you want to be numb? I think that would be a key factor in this early stage. It is often recommended to totally abstain from drinking for a few weeks, to see how you like it, see what comes up when you let yourself feel, as scary as that may sound. When I suggested goals, that is because it will give you a focus and make you be accountable. You can write them in the program, as well as tracking your drinking in the diary. Having this info in print will heighten your awareness which in itself can lead to changes. Goals can be anything you want: I will not drink when I am alone; whenever I want a drink, I will wait at least 15 minutes; when I go out, I will not have a drink beforehand. Does this sound do-able? I encourage you to try, and to start the readings in the program as there is so much valuable information there!

If you aren't ready to stop for a while, I suggest you write down every drink you have and at what time you have it for a whole week. This is also a great exercise in awareness, which may encourage change. It sounds like you are also aware that you are not alone! That is good too.

We are here for you! Be gentle with yourself.

Tiana, Health Educator

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12

Just a quick note to say "thank you" I am just home for lunch and I was not expecting so many responses. I will write more later but want to thank you for taking the time to support me!!!! Beating myself up today :( Thank you for being here :)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12

Congrats!!!! 25 days is a great|!!!!

Just home for lunch and I have found so much support in your e-mail just wanted to say a quick thank you and I will write more tonight....means the world to me you would take such time to support me :)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12

Hello

Thank you so much for your story and response, I have never reached for help from the outside but all of sudden I don't feel so alone on here !!

I have gone without alcholol for extended periods of time in my life but always seem to fall back into it thinking I can manage this but I will be okay for awhile until I have the night that I do or say something stupid and I beat myself all over again. I know I will always have this disease

Thanks again

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 12

Tiana

Thank you for taking the time to welcome me :)

When you say realistic goals do you think this disease can be managed? I am such an all or nothing kind of person that the thought of never having drink is very overwhelming yet I know I can't just have one or two. I find I have to have a certain amount in my system to obliterate all that life has dealt me. I want so much to understand this disease because I have battle with it for so long :(

Thank you

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I need support from others who understand :(