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Changing your relationship with alcohol

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1022

Yes, yes, yes... you sound so much like me... going OUT isn't the problem. It's the drinking at home that is the problem. If you (or anyone else) can come up with other pleasant activities to do instead of drinking.... I'd love to hear (although, I suspect what works is a pretty individual thing.)

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 223

Hi lostjack,

Thanks with sharing your challenges with us. These first couple of days and weeks can be hard but you have made great strides coming here and starting the program. Early on, it is important to reward yourself frequently for the progress you have made. Consider substituting that time you would have spend drinking with a enjoyable activity. What pleasant activities were you not able to do when you were drinking? Rediscovering these may be a great reinforcement towards your new lifestyle without alcohol.

I know it is easier said than done but keep working at it. Please visit the section in "getting starting" entitled "the first two weeks" as it has a lot of tips to cope with early challenges.

Keep posting and sharing your success with us.

You can do this! We will help you anyway we can.

Jason, Bilingual Health Educator

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 23

I completely understand what you are saying--it is hard to say that you are going to cut down--let alone quit altogether. I just know that I need to do it and I think I have reached the point where I can make a commitment. I am only on the first day and already drinking is consuming my every thought. I went to the grocery store this morning and purposely avoided the aisles with wine and beer. I didn't buy tomato juice because I know I will want vodka to go with it. It is going to be very hard to get used to not drinking regularly.
I pretty much hide my drinking from most people. I am a single mom and tend to drink mostly at home alone. I feel that this is even more destructive. I wish that my drinking was more of a social thing; I think this would make quitting easier for me. I bought a book today that I have been meaning to read and I loaded the fridge with tea, juice and water. I am trying to eliminate some of my triggers. I wish you luck and know that I will be on here regularly to try to get through these first few days, weeks, months....

~jacks

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1022

* I haven't made a commitment either way... I find it rather telling that I left out that word in my last post <sigh>

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1022

Thank you for posting Lostjack... It sure helps to know I'm not alone in this type of thinking. I don't wish this struggle on anyone, but I'm glad I'm not alone. I still haven't made a either way... to cut back, quit drinking or quit trying... but I'm still here and really trying to take in the information without judging myself for being on the fence about it. It's a lot easier to just tell myself I'm a stupid sh** and will never change. The not judging is hard!

One positive thing is that I'm taking the advice to drink a lot of water and for two days now I just have had less alcohol to drink... without even trying. When I'm concentrating on taking in enough water (and getting to the loo in time

), I find my craving thoughts diverted. That's just two days, but still... it feels good.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 23

I know exactly what you mean. I feel the same about wanting to change.

I want to change my relationship with alcohol too, but what happens when I do? I scored the same as you did on the test. I was as shocked as you were with the results. I am scared about what life will be like without alcohol. I don't know if I want to live my life without ever drinking again--seems like a strange prospect. Everything I do seems like it involves drinking to some degree. Can I say no? And more importantly, do I want to?

I guess the main thing I need to remember is I cannot go on living the way I do right now...I will be dead at an early age if I continue. This is what I need to remember daily. One day at a time...

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 23

All of those statements sound like me.

I have a hard time believing that is really how I feel.

I mean I know I feel like that, but seeing it in black and white makes it real.

I can't believe that I have let alcohol control my life so much.

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 653

Hi Mapuan,

What you are experiencing is normal. It is tiring to make changes, especially if it feels like a continual battle. You are doing great and you will continue to do so! Keep logging on, asking questions, looking for answers and help, being aware. Have you set some goals for yourself?

It seems to me that you will certainly find your attitude about yourself changes as you make progress, or even as you continue to be aware. You will feel more in control, and it will be liberating! Thinking positive is also very important! Congratulate yourself on your little victories, and keep in mind the benefits of changing your relationship with alcohol- those may all be things that are unique to you. Hopefully others willl have encouraging stories to share with you.

Keep up the good work!

Tiana, Health Educator

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1022

Yesterday Ashley wrote: "It certainly sounds like you feel alcohol is an important part of your personality! It is not"

In the toolbox I'm reading that if I feel drinking is part of my self image I am to think: "I feel more like myself without a crutch."

The truth is (and I've said this many, many times)... I feel MORE like myself when I'm drinking.

Do other ppl feel this way? Or better yet, has anyone felt that way when you started and then changed your thinking as you progressed on the journey to change your relationship with alcohol?

14 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1022

I DO have a choice. I can choose how I want to do this. Chose who I am. In the negative, I do not want to be a person controlled by alcohol... a person who looks forward to nothing else but the next drink. I can choose to find something else to look forward to...... um...... worst time is right after work, wanting to relax......... changing my relationship with alcohol??? If I choose to continue my relationship with alcohol, I sure would like it to be more balanced/equal. I don't want alcohol making my decisions for me. I'm just so tired. you know?

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Changing your relationship with alcohol