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11 years and counting

Timbo637

2024-10-31 6:49 AM

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Feels like hell week all over!!

Timbo637

2024-10-30 9:38 AM

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Roller Coaster Withdrawal

Timbo637

2024-10-14 12:28 PM

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Smile....and don't shoot the messenger

Timbo637

2024-09-27 3:17 PM

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16 years ago 0 12049 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
John,
 
Great to see your progression!  Take care of you first and be happy with what you have accomplished.  You have come along way and are making daily changes.  Take it slow and congrats for being good to your mind and body first!
 


Josie, Health Educator
16 years ago 0 126 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hello everyone,
 
Just wanted to let everyone know that I've continued to stop drinking and I feel so much better.  I understand that it takes a couple of weeks to get alcohol completely out of your system.  I also, understand that you can become emotionally unstable during this period, so I have reframed from flirting with any woman and starting any new relationships until I feel strong enough to handle the emotions that come along with them.
 
This however, doesn't mean that I have not been having fun.  I have started planning my weekends around non-drinking events and spending quality time with myself every Sunday with cultural entertainment.  The arts are a wonderful distraction that takes my mind off of daily problems and helps me appreciate other points of view. 
16 years ago 0 955 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
You are absolutely right BigJohn!
You've got a great attitude!
Enjoy the weekend, and take pleasure in taking care of you
 
Sarah, Health Educator
16 years ago 0 126 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Ready to face another weekend.  But, this time I have plans to keep myself busy doing things that make me happy.  I am not going to try to do things that I feel will create a joyful environment for others.  I will become a little selfish this weekend and think about myself.  Because if I am happy, maybe others will take comfort and share my joy.
 
Wish me luck on my road to recovery. 
16 years ago 0 126 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
They say the true judge of persons' character is not how they act when things are going good, but how they manage themselves when problems arise.
 
Each day may provide challenges but drinking won't make them go away. 
16 years ago 0 1288 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
BigJohn,
 
That's a great revelation. You're right, you are responsible for you health and hapiness. Do what it takes to achieve your goals, and be patient with yourself. Things don't change overnight as i'm sure you already know.
 
All the best ,
 
 
Sylvie, Bilingual Health Educator
16 years ago 0 126 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hello group,
 
I've been having a good month so far.  I have managed to stay sober and it's getting easier everyday.  I also attended a therapy session this month, to discuss my marital situation. 
 
I have admitted to myself that I am an alcoholic and must stop drinking.  However, through therapy, I found out that my wife is suffering from depression and has been contributing to my unhappiness.  Now that I have the facts about my family situation and it's not all my fault.  Recovery is more important to me than ever. 
 
My therapist suggested that I get a divorce and start a new life alone.  This must happen soon.  The divorce may benefit my wife too, by forcing her to deal with her depression.  I realize now that I am not responsible for her happiness.  I am only responsible for my own life. 
 
I welcome your comments.
 
Best of luck to you all Bigjohn.
16 years ago 0 126 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Yes my mother is a god send and supports me fully.  I have begun to look for spritual guidance to help me deal with daily challenges.  My son and I will have to come through this together.  I don't every want to loss his love or respect.  Thanks for understanding me and leting me talk so openly.
16 years ago 0 955 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Big.John,
 
Thank you for sharing your story here. It sounds like you are definitely taking the right steps on the road to recovery. By seeking support and treatment from a marriage counsellor and attending group meetings, you have the opportunity to experience positive benefits in your own life and those around you. It is also sounds very beneficial that you have access to support services from your job. Good for you using these resources!
 
You mention how you are uncomfortable with how your house looks when you have guests over. Have you spoken to your wife about this? Perhaps by sitting down with her and expressing your feelings about how your home looks, she may understand where you are coming from.
 
It also sounds like you have the support of your son and mother through your recovery. Does it help to talk to them about what you are feeling?
 
Continue to post and let us know how you are doing. We are here for you every step of the way!
 
 
Sarah, Health Educator
16 years ago 0 126 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0

Thanks for posting this information and reminding me that alcoholicism is a desease that can be treated. And that there is proper treatment.  This website is a god send to me.  I have been spending my afternoon, reading and repsonding to as many postings as possible.  It helps to talk about my problem with others who can freely share thier thoughts with me. 

As I have stated before in other postings this my first day of facing that I am an Alcholic and need to addmit it to myself and seek a recovery support group.  I am currently seeking AAA support meetings in my area to begin attending them before any court orders that will require me to attend. 

I know it's not going to be easy or convient at first but I am willing to take what ever steps are needed and I have the support of my mom and other family friends.  I may also require me to exam my marriage, which I believe is loveless and a contributor to my emotional unhappiness.  I will be seeing a addition and marriage counseler next week for my first session.  So far I have seemed to get supportive news from the family outreach services from my job.  I have decided to face my problems head on and if necessary make big changes in my life to get better.  This may mean divorcing my abusive spouse or seeking counseling to discover what the root of my  problems are.  My mother seems to think it's got a lot to do with my marrieage to an older woman who has always tried to ware the paints in our relationship.  By controlled my money and ability to freely enjoy my time alone or with others.  I have no friends from work over because my house is alway unkept by my wife and I am embarssed for anyone other than her friends to see it.

I am a profesional and would not like to have my co-workers see how I live.  I take grate care to keep my lawn serviced and neat so that my neighbors think I have the rest of my house organized also.  I recently had my kitchen remodled and painted but my spouse will not keep the dishs done.  I have always had to clean up before anyone important comes over. 

Once in a while her company will come over unexpcectd and eat up most of our food.  But she to has a unkept home with trouble getting remodeling projects completed.  I now understand that my problem are much deeper that they appear on the surface.  But, I can not blame anyone else for excepting this type of life and drinking to deal with my issues.

A spouse who refuses to help me stop drinking and continue to use drugs and alcholal in front of my is of no use to my future plans.  I am trying to get a temporary assignment to where my home town is in order to start my divorce and recovery programs.  This will allow me to work in one town and come home on weekends to demonstrate that I have not abandon my home while the divorce goes throught.  On got peace of news is that because of my retired military status, I might be possible to file in my town of record before entering the service, which might be favorable to me with the settelment.  I have only one son who is in college and is now able to understand my unhappiness.  I understand the he will still love me as his father, if I can stop drinking.  I have decided not to be affraid of living as a single middle aged man with the possiblity of not finding some to share my life with right away, but my mother says the happiness will find me if I pray and read the bible.


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