Well I certainly don't have a need to be "first," but I'm taking a break between two high-stress tasks (the usual time for me to duck outside for a quick cigarette to celebrate my effectiveness, ha ha!)
My journey is not characterized by success, but by a series of (call 'em what they are) failures. First quit back in the day when it was perfectly okay to smoke everywhere: offices, classrooms, public buildings, shopping malls, you name it. Way back before anyone ever dreamed of NRT. Then tried to link the quit with religious observances; giving them up for Lent, giving myself a Christmas present, celebrating Easter in a new way, etc. Tried to do it for my small children, who knew enough that smoking was somehow suicidal, and why did I want to leave them? Then tried to quit because it was the right thing to do. (Me, doing the right thing has never come easily or naturally to me!)
This time, it seems a matter of ironic selfishness. I'm doing it so I will be free from that ridiculous and embarrassing addiction; doing it so I will look, feel, and smell better; doing it so I can save some hard-earned money and not line the pockets of Philip Morris executives; doing so I can gain a modicum of self respect as I face my sunset years. Doing because I am just SO DONE with smoking.
peteg
