I still laugh at this because it it soooooooooooo true.Quit Meter
$569,512.50
Amount Saved
Quit Meter
Days: 5360 Hours: 5
Minutes: 8 Seconds: 11
Life Gained
Quit Meter
45561
Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter
911,220
Cigarettes Not Smoked
How to Quit Smoking in Six Easy Steps
STEP 1: HUMBLE YOURSELF. Your addiction to cigarettes is a beast about the size
of Godzilla. Stockpile all the ammunition you can get your hands on ahead of
your quit date. If a pacifier is what works for you, swallow your pride and
keep on suckin', brother!
STEP 2: THINK ROCKY BALBOA. During the first week of your quit, that Godzilla
of addiction is going to twist your innards, pound your head, fray your nerves
and stomp you into the ground. Remember Rocky: face bruised and bloody, eye
swollen shut, slumped against the ropes. Rocky prevailed in the end because,
when things were looking bleakest, he did one simple thing: HE REFUSED TO FALL
DOWN.
STEP 3: NO, REALLY, IT IS YOU. Even if you normally have the
disposition of Mother Teresa, during weeks one through four of the quit you
will discover the Hitler hiding under your habit. You will find that even the
smallest of offenses warrants your full wrath. You will be tempted to give
cashiers, employers, and discourteous bus passengers a piece of your mind.
Don't. Actually, a piece of your mind is not worth much at this point. You are
an irrational boob. Bite your tongue. It will save you countless apologies and,
possibly, a lawsuit down the pike.
STEP 4: HEY, STUPID! YES, YOU. Between week one through, oh, maybe
week twelve, you will have the i.q. of a rutabaga. You will forget
things. You will be clumsy. With the exception of performing
household chores at 3 a.m. to combat
insomnia, you will accomplish almost nothing of significance. This
is temporary. However, if you have a safety sensitive job (i.e., nuclear
reactor operator, air traffic controller,), you may want to consider taking a
few days off.
STEP 5: GET OVER YOUR PITIFUL, LITTLE SELF. During the course of the
quit, you will suffer from the blues, the blahs, the bleaks and rock bottoms.
The best cure for those conditions is right here on the SSC. Find
someone in worse shape than you and extend your hand. Find someone just getting
ready to quit and share your experience. Find someone
who's discouraged and offer hope. Find someone who's feeling down
and offer humor. You may find that every time you help someone else, you will
double the rewards that you will feel.
Quit Meter
$284,756.25
Amount Saved
Quit Meter
Days: 6834 Hours: 6
Minutes: 32 Seconds: 56
Life Gained
Quit Meter
45561
Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter
1,139,025
Cigarettes Not Smoked
