As well as making youself remember the reality of smoking outside in all weathers I thought of a new one to rememeber: When you get one of those 'rogue' cigarettes which have that tar residue in the tip and it goes on your tongue and the whole thing tastes disgusting and bitter and usually the end goes soggy 'cos you salivate to get rid of the bitterness. Then you put it out and wish you hadn't bothered. Now you can be glad you don't even have to try. Gen :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/28/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 182 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,912 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] �910.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 24 [B]Hrs:[/B] 3 [B]Mins:[/B] 30 [B]Seconds:[/B] 42

Hey Kev, Glad to hear you sounding so good today. Have a great rest of the day! I promise I will not smoke today. :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]8/25/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 32 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 960 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $187.20 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 2 [B]Hrs:[/B] 21 [B]Mins:[/B] 32 [B]Seconds:[/B] 13

Now I am home sweet home for the day. Which means I can round off this week in the happiness that I didn't end up smoking. Every day that I can say ' Well I didn't smoke' is a great day as far as I am concerned. In the effort of keeping things short and sweet. The following are some short stories and the keeping of promises. 'The Forgotten Jar' When I decided to quit all that time ago. I decided to put all my spare cigarettes into a jar with water in it. I think I saw John Cleese do it in an advert. The idea was as Mr Cleese put it, to open it up days into your quit and smell it to remember what you would smell like if you smoked. So 40'ish cigarette in some water was put into a cupboard for me to take out later and smell it..except I completely forgot about it until last weekend when I took it down to be cleared out. It didn't smell at all as I had forgot to put a lid on it. But what was interesting is there was some white furry stuff growing on the cigarettes!! I had been unwaringly been growing a new bacterial colony. Anyway if you are new to quitting. I am told this is worth doing. But remember to put a lid on that jar. 'If you hum it, I can play it' As promised. A completely random selection from my smokefree sixty playlist. I hope Ex-Roller and Kelly approve :) Madeline Peyroux 'Dreamland' (Dreamland) Sonic Youth 'Sleepin' around' (Rather Ripped) Lacuna Coil 'Heir of a Dying Day' (Unleashed Memories) Guns n Roses 'Right next door' (Use Your Illusion Vol 1) Red House Painters 'Japanese to English' (Retrospective) Live 'Selling the Drama' (Awake - The best of Live) Avril Lavigne 'Innocence' (The Best Damn Thing) Nine Inch Nails 'Physical (you're so)' (Broken) Manic Street Preachers 'Damned Dog' (Generation Terrorist) Breed 77 'Induviduo' (Cultura) Kelly, Rise Against... nice! I think you might like the last one on this list. The first one is for romantic softies btw. Ministry 'Just One Fix' I dedicate to my junkie. I think I have probably written enough to bore everyone senseless now so I will shut up. Here's hoping everyone has a great smokefree day/night! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]7/12/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 76 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,900 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] �319.20 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 9 [B]Hrs:[/B] 13 [B]Mins:[/B] 30 [B]Seconds:[/B] 48

Hi Sue, Yes Unhooked is great. Actually you're all great. I hug everyone equally :) I have done the stand out in the cold thing this mornng watching everyone smoke. Thinking...its blimmin freezing! Getting my hair cut on holiday added the the effect me thinks. The advantages are that I don't feel left out and get to feel the disadvantages of smoking without actually smoking. A bit like the ghosts of christmas past present and future. I'm sure I saw Tiny Tim ask for a light :) Enough Kev humour for one day. Today I will be continuing to work on controling these junkie visions. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]7/12/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 76 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,900 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] �319.20 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 9 [B]Hrs:[/B] 12 [B]Mins:[/B] 58 [B]Seconds:[/B] 53

Kev, she is something isn't she? This is why we love Unhooked :) Just remember - Smoking Sucks, no one smokes anymore!! This winter you will be warm and dry mate! Sue [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]5/3/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 146 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,460 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $255.50 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 13 [B]Hrs:[/B] 21 [B]Mins:[/B] 10 [B]Seconds:[/B] 6

Short Version : Long story short. I have been working on changing that from last night. I am really grateful for being pointed in the right direction (yet again). I may go out for a virtual smoke to remind myself of what i am not missing today (the frozen fingers and other parts). As usual, there is a short version as above and the long winded version :) Below is the longer version for the interests of journaling. *** Long Version : Unhooked, I am really glad you can see my junkie for what it is. I spent most of last night awake thinking about it. It bugs the heck out of me that sometimes (ok most of the time) I cannot distinguish between normal kev thought and junkie thought. Well at least not instantly. Sometimes I read my threads a couple of days later and see it clear as day. A junkie thought can change state of mind. Yes this daydreaming is definitely junkie thinking in a more visual manner. Only seeing what the junkie wants me to see. I don't see the coughing and the feeling like rubbish in the morning in these daydreams. I only see me standing up against the system. I am normally quite quiet so that may well have been one of my ways of standing out (though I never really see it that way normally). Things like that are great food for a junkie. Its picked up on the way that I am uneasy about how the no smoking laws were brought in without sanity checking. I do remember having to turn different directions to get a cigarette to light and the fact of me attempting to smoke a clearly drowned cigarette (due to it pouring in rain). I very clearly remember having to take my gloves off and feeling each hand freeze as I smoke that cigarette in autumn/winter. Junkie vision (aka daydreaming) is like state run television. You only get to see what it wants you to see. I've got to keep my guard up. The junkie in me is trying new ways to get me to smoke and I have been falling for it. Weird thing is, when I feel like I am going to smoke and that I have run out of fighting energy, somehow I find some energy I never knew I had. So yep, I have to admit that I spend most of my life in a permanent state of confusion with the junkie me convincing me that I am going to smoke and it will be good. Me knowing deep down that actually I don't want to smoke (that IS why I haven't smoked). I promise to my friends here that I WILL NOT SMOKE today. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]7/12/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 76 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,900 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] �319.20 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 9 [B]Hrs:[/B] 12 [B]Mins:[/B] 41 [B]Seconds:[/B] 31

Kevin, smack that junkie down right now! You're not going to smoke now because you don't smoke. You say that you are crap at lying and you have to be honest. Well, be honest about this "daydreaming" of yours, too. It's just the junkie trying to romanticize & glamourize smoking, & make you nostalgic for it. REALLY imagine yourself smoking at the bus stop, in the pouring rain & driving wind. Coughing & hacking & trying to keep the cigarette lit & dry. Think about that evil taste & disgusting smell. Not much of a daydream if you don't let the junkie lead, is it? Now, to this nonsense about if you smoked now, you think you might "actually give it another try" like Lolo did, that is you letting the junkie convince you that you can always quit again because look how well you're doing. Really, let's look for the logic there. "I have quit for 75 of the most difficult days of my life. If I smoke now, I can always put myself through the hell of that first month again." Doesn't work for me, Kev. You? Don't let your mind go there, Kev, & when you think it might, go back to all the positives you told us about. More & bettter quality time with your family, more money, better physical health, less drinking, better eating habits, to name a few. You won't smoke, Kev, & I promise, neither will I. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]5/13/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 135 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,700 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1,485.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 13 [B]Hrs:[/B] 13 [B]Mins:[/B] 27 [B]Seconds:[/B] 1

Penguin, Nice to see you. Yes I think there may be a phase that I am not too aware about. I've never actually been in this position before Normally I last between 6 hours and 3 days! I'm glad you know about this sort of stuff. Don't suppose you know roughly how long it lasts? Mine are more than thoughts. Kelly is right, it is just a case of finding the switch to turn them off. I wonder if my mum has been slipping something in my tea? :) It wouldn't suprise me if the sweetners are right next to the microdots. My mum does have a strange order of things in the kitchen. I know how much I get told off when I put the glasses and cups in the wrong place. :) Ok enough kev humour from me. I obviously completely missed the NO MANS LAND threads. I am really glad you are still smokefree. Keep at it Penguin and I will try the same. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]7/12/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 75 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,875 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] �315.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 9 [B]Hrs:[/B] 10 [B]Mins:[/B] 43 [B]Seconds:[/B] 16

Hi Kelly, thanks for your promise and I promise not to smoke today too. I'll search those bands/artists out! Yippee I get to listen to some Kelly stuff! :) For you and the wonderful Ex-Roller, I have my smokefree playlist which I have been writing down as songs come up. I WILL post it before the end of the week. I promise that. Some you will have heard of and some you won't have. No electronica this time :) Stuff you might actually like. Gen, cool I shall relay the news. Ah thats clover! I thought it was bird footprints in sand. :) Its lucky I don't go to any art galleries hey :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]7/12/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 75 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,875 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] �315.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 9 [B]Hrs:[/B] 10 [B]Mins:[/B] 39 [B]Seconds:[/B] 17

Oh, one other thing, Kev... I promise not to smoke today. :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]8/25/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 31 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 930 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $181.35 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 2 [B]Hrs:[/B] 19 [B]Mins:[/B] 23 [B]Seconds:[/B] 55