Cdg, You will once again be able to go, speaking as once agoraphobic, then in remission and traveled and worked for 3yrs panic free, to the attacks coming back and the agoraphobia. Right now, I think your still sensitized to what happened and the usual thoughts for us "Will I be like this forever? Making progress and then one setback brings the freshness of fear back with the panic. Also I think since you got chastised for not being able to control it, has got you down, however from reading your post, I TRULY think your husband is geninunely SORRY. Don't beat yourself up over this, he is great, even my own gets perturbed with me, I can be making progress, then bam a setback, and it catches them off guard too, but we as the sufferers feel totally devastated by it. I can't count the times early on (but they have since passed, since they pretty much know they can come out of nowhere), that if I make one accomplishment one day, they dont understand the next day I may not. It isnt getting over a phobia in one day-I sure wish it was!! It takes time and patience in those closest to you and yourself. Sometimes it helps before embarking somewhere that you tell or ask the person, if I getting to feeling very uncomfortable and wish to leave, will we do so without criticism? This I find helps alot, it is almost as if you have permission to feel anxious, yet not trapped, and find yourself going without having to turn back. Its really like a psychological crutch of the disorder, just as the meds, you have the meds to calm you down, and the means to leave if need be without feeling overwhelming guilt upon you. Of course we all try to float and deal with it as best we can, but if it really is getting bad, then you know you can leave. Better to do that, than suffer a major setback, and feel you have let yourself and others down. I had read once a woman explain living with agoraphobia and the trust of your support person. This is written by a women named Ellen. Anxiety /agoraphobia may have many different facets, forms and "quirks," most of which are very foreign to the average individual. It's very important to many phobics that a certain amount of control be afforded them in most anxiety-provoking situations. Hence we have anoth

Hi Chanda, I am new to this site and don't have much in the way of advice to offer to you but I can offer my support and understanding. I had gone for 2 years without a panic attack until a couple of months ago when cluster attacks started hitting me out of the blue. My boyfriend is the most understanding person that I could ever ask to have by my side but he, too, gets "irritated" at times with me and I know that no matter how much he tries to understand, the only people that can truly ever understand are those that walk the same path as you and I. We both know how difficult the "unknown" is for us and that it's so much more than "just in our heads" and it sometimes make me very angry to think that others just don't get it at all! I go through the whole "why me" thing and I too get very tired of making sure that the xanax is never more than a pants pocket away (although my doctor has recently taken me off). I wish you the best in each day and just know that you aren't alone out there! Best wishes! kathy

Hi everybody, I'm not having the best time right now. It started when we went on a 1 night camping trip & I panicked going through the gate to the park & had to take a Xanax & sit outside the gate for a few minutes & calm down. Then I went in & was ok for the rest of the time. Well, before this I've been doing really good, I've even posted in "success stories" & things have been real positive lately. As I've said a million times, my husband is really great & supportive. But when I panicked going camping he got irratated & kinda lost his patience with me. That really hurt me!! I understand that he's human too & is intitled to his feelings but he is the only person that I ever talk to about this because he is the only person who has ever even tried to understand. Everyone just makes jokes or says "it's all in your head, just control it". When he got irritated with me I just felt like noone understands..I've always felt so lucky to have him be so supportive & now I feel like I have noone thru this. He apologized & said that since I'd been doing so good lately that he just didn't expect me to have problems there. It caught him off guard also, he said. I don't know.. I just feel very alone right now. I wonder if I will ever be able to go anywhere without worrying, looking for exit signs, or packing my Xanax. I use to enjoy new things & places & now everything is a challenge. Will I ever get over this....? Chanda