Hi,
Sometimes I read posts from people having a hard time and I so wish I could say something to make it go away and be easier. There's never the right words.....but sometimes images do what words can't.
I feel like I should tell you something I saw today. I don't know why I feel I should tell you....but I'll follow the proding.
I am a photogrpaher and photo tech. I was working on some pictures today. It was of a man home from the hospital dying of lung cancer. I'm sure he looked older than he really is. Even in the state he was in I would venture to say he was in his early 50's.
His house was modest...almost a little cottage looking. There was a very pretty large deck with built in bench seats and planters with large red geramiums. The deck seemed almost oversized for this quaint little cottage house. There was lots of pretty woods and land around this house...and I couldn't help but notice that someone must love gardening, as the flower beds were so pretty.
At first, this man was in a hospital bed in the house. The first few pictures were of him sleeping and what looked like his wife with her hand lovingly on his arm. She looked so tired and her eyes spoke volumns of emotions I shudder from imagining.
Later... the pictures showed him compassionately moved outside. More than likely the deck and the beauty of nature around him was something he loved. They cared enough to do this for him.
Most of the pictures his eyes were closed. The few of his eyes opened told of a painful journey dashed with unknown fear. The final picture was of him in this large hospital bed on his deck.... with the sun warming his face, for perhaps the last time. His large black lab was laying on his bed with his eyes looking up at his master as his head layed across his body. The mans eyes gazed into nowhere.
I was mesmorized with the prints and said a prayer to God to be with this man in his pain and misery and to give this woman in the picture strength and peace.
I'm sure this man only has days left....if not hours. The rest of the afternoon and even till this very minute I thank God for the simple blessing of this not being me. By His grace it won't be. Did I listen to His voice within me soon enough to end this cigarette folly. I hope so.
I'm not sure what I am trying to say. I only hope this story says it all and is what some of you needed to hear to get over this hump of grief and into one of rejoicing your quit.
You all know what your hearts "really" want, or you wouldn't be here. Please don't believe the lie that it was better before.
I like this quote:
"THROW YOUR HEART OUT IN FRONT OF YOU
AND RUN AHEAD TO CATCH IT."
MERCY
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]1/21/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 134
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,680
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $598.98
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 17 [B]Hrs:[/B] 16 [B]Mins:[/B] 12 [B]Seconds:[/B] 22